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The lords of baseball saw an opportunity to throw some high hard ones by me while I've been away. To that I say, ha! You're going to have to do a lot better than this to get one by me. Besides, I have a team of experts not only finding these stories for me, they read them to me, they explain them to me, they spell out some of the words phonetically to me, and they diffuse bombs in their spare time.So without further ado, I give you: "The things you've missed while I've been away."Or is that, "The things I've missed while you've been away?"Maybe it's "The things that we've all missed while David Wright's been away" ...Oh, the hell with it, here's some stuff:Item: Scott Kazmir traded to the Angels for two players not named Victor Zambrano.First person that says "see, told you so" gets a beating. Kazmir for Zambrano: Still the worst trade ever. Anybody who wants me to rehash why it's worse than Ryan for...