Originally written on Monkey with a Halo  |  Last updated 11/9/14
Let's face it, this whole Josh Hamilton thing isn't working out so great. He's easily the most disappointing and most frustrating player on an incredibly disappointing and frustrating team. The problem is that Josh isn't going anywhere. We fans are just going to have to make the best of it, so to prepare you for what is sure to be a tough emotional journey, we present the Five Stages of Rooting for Josh Hamilton. Our sincere hope is that if/when you feel any of these feelings, you will be comforted by the fact that they are entirely normal and merely a part of where you are when it comes to making peace with having Josh Hamilton on the team you love.   DENIAL "He'll be fine. He's just streaky." "I'm sure he just has to get comfortable with his new team and then everything will fall into place." "There's nothing wrong with him, he's always swung at everything. Someday soon the results will be there and we'll all be like 'Oh. Oh, OK.'" "He hit homers in back-to-back games! He's about to turn things around. I can feel it!" (TWO MONTHS LATER) "He had three hits last night! He's about to turn things around. I can feel it!"   ANGER "God dammit! I knew we shouldn't have signed this clown. I always hated him when he was a Ranger!" "At least act like you care, you overpaid sack of crap!" "STOP SWINGING AT BREAKING BALLS IN THE DIRT, ASSHOLE!" "Why don't you pray to Jesus to give you the ability to recognize a changeup!" BARGAINING "Maybe if Scioscia just drops him in the order, he can hit with less pressure and find a groove." "The Angels should platoon Josh, just until he regains his confidence." "He's got to be hiding an injury, right? Right? RIGHT??!!?!" "Do you think we can trade Hamilton for Vernon Wells?"   DEPRESSION "This team is screwed with all these bad contracts. They are going to miss the playoffs for the next decade. I quit." "I can't believe the Angels still have to pay Hamilton for another four and a half years." "I can't believe I have to watch Josh Hamilton play for another four and a half years." /sits at computer refreshing sadjoshhamilton.tumblr.com every five minutes while weeping   ACCEPTANCE "Hamilton is never going to get better. That's fine. The Angels will just hide him on the bench and overpay for a replacement, just like they did with Vernon Wells before him and Gary Matthews before him and so on and so on." "This is what we deserve for being so greedy. They should have just re-signed Hunter and left it at that." "Well, he can kind of hit righties. He'll be overpaid but he can still provide some utility if used judiciously. That's better than nothing" "Whatever. At least the Angels still have Trout." [follow]
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Panthers coach replaces break-in victims’ Christmas presents

Cardinals Bruce Arians benches Logan Thomas on Christmas Day

Richard Sherman: Marshawn Lynch having MVP season

Curt Schilling tweeted advice to Johnny Manziel

Aaron Rodgers buys TVs for Packers teammates

Harbaugh smiled when asked about Michigan's bday tweet

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Jackie Robinson West Little League accused of cheating

Police: Fire that burned down McClain's home 'suspicious'

Furniture store will refund purchases if OSU wins title

What each NFC team in the hunt should ask for from Santa

Is SI ashamed to mention Jameis Winston on its cover?

Kobe Bryant disappointed Lakers didn't get Rajon Rondo

Q&A with Rich Eisen; TNF, DirecTV and living in LA

Is the NFL playoff system heading south?

WATCH: Quincy Acy ejected for throwing punch at John Wall

Billy Beane did not want to trade Josh Donaldson

Peyton Manning plans to be back with Broncos next year

WATCH: Blazers announcer botches Damian Lillard call

WATCH: P.K. Subban disguises himself, surprises kids for Xmas

Baseball cards: a fan's love for the ultimate stocking stuffer

Packers game is a career defining moment for Stafford

A look inside Jason Grilli's contract with the Braves

10 Week 17 NFL matchups that will impact the playoffs

WATCH: Bahamas Bowl ends on insane Hail Mary play

All Sports News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.

Q&A with Rich Eisen; TNF, DirecTV and living in LA

Dan Le Batard sums up Miami's relationship with LeBron

Is the NFL playoff system heading south?

WATCH: Announcer botches call

Police: McClain fire 'suspicious'

10 Week 17 NFL matchups that will impact the playoffs

Bahamas Bowl ends on crazy Hail Mary

49ers OT Davis takes shot at coordinator

Will FIFA ever care to change?

Top storyline for each Week 17 game

40 great Christmas-related sports names

Nick Mangold and dealing with feelings as a sports fan

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.