Travis Tack’s Top Tweets!

Mutants, explosions, drugs, conspiracy, aliens and rock & roll – very few of these things will be mentioned in the following article (but I needed the buzz words up top so people will read it). In the spirit of National Lampoon’s own self-aggrandizement, I’m going to reiterate some of my favorite thoughts from my twitter account. Take a look – I have some pretty ******* awesome ideas. TWEETS: 1. ) John Boehner reminds me of a small town Sheriff who just found out he needs to solve a triple rape-homicide. 2.) My father was a peach cobbler. He made shoes for fruit. 3.) Airport drinking is acceptable no matter what time of day it is. That’s why I’m setting up residence here 4.) Opportunity doesn’t always knock. Sometimes it breaks in your window and tries to rape you. 5.) The TV just told me I should follow James Patterson’s Facebook page – but I know I’d only read it at the airport. 6.) My downstairs neighbors must be cooking – that’...