Originally written on College Spun  |  Last updated 11/19/14
(Brett Padelford/The Spirit Of Troy/Facebook) On Monday, Will Ferrell returned to his alma mater, USC, to speak with students at a charity event for “Cancer For College,” a scholarship program for young cancer survivors. The program was created by Ferrell’s fraternity brother and Trojan baseball alum Craig Pollard, who went through a second bout with Hodgkins-Lymphoma. Among the highlights were: Ferrell’s advice to a student asking for “five easy steps to cracking the code to the female heart”: “No 1: You gotta bathe. No. 2: V-necks do not work. No. 3: Vogue poetry is coming back – 10-to-15-page poems. No. 4: Take a lady to dinner and offer to pay with a coupon. And No. 5: Personal hygiene” Ferrell on USC’s tuition now compared to when he was a student in the 80s: “It’s not worth it.” Former USC coach Pete Carroll made a surprise appearance via Skype to promote “Cancer For College.” “You’re coming back, right?!” pleaded Ferrell. But the big moment came at the end of the show, when Ferrell marched out with the USC band while wearing the famous drum major uniform. If you’ve ever wanted to see what Ron Burgundy would do with a sword, here you go. Must say, it’s a better look for him than Captain Compete.

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