Cowboy Tony's Birthday: What's Going On In this Photo?

Photo: Robert Hart

A. Handy Smurf smurfed all over Jessica Simpson's smurf.
B. Aaron Brooks is booty dancing with a Hollywood starlet after sneaking into another party.
C. Tony Romo is a bundle of nerves and bites his nails because he has no idea how to react and even less an idea how he landed a bombshell.
D. Poppa Joe is PISSED he didn't get enough lead time to hype up this cake eating event. Worse yet, he wasn't the sole photog at this party, and couldn't make money of the exploitation of his daughter. Screw you, Robert Hart.
E. That fucking hat looks retarded.
F. In Tony's actual fantasy, that's Jason Witten "seducing" him.

You make the call.