So apparently Denise from Survivor is not a lunch lady, and she didn’t lose her job by going on the show.  She is actually a janitor, and she received permission to go on the show.  So her sad little story about getting fired from the lunch room is a damn lie!! So now she is donating the $50,000 she received for her fake job firing to a charity.  When I heard this, I was shocked.  She not only lied about her job to the producers and on live TV, but she also made up a story about her mullet.  She claimed the reason for her “interesting” haircut is so she can keep her hair out of food and still have long hair in the back to please her husband because she is a woman (read that sentence 5 times, and you might just puke like I just did)  Her husband is probably more concerned about those rolls on her stomach than her long hair.  So the question is if she is not a lunch lady, then why does she have a mullet??? I need to know this.  I must.

Moving on basketball…

Bill Simmons released his annual trade value rankings, I agree with him for the most part, especially his assessment of Dirk Nowitzki.  We will get to that later.  But the worst part about his whole column is his abuse of the nickname, D-Ho, for Dwight Howard.  When did it become cool to just shorten athlete’s name for nicknames?  First of all, no one wants to be call a hoe (well not in public anyways), and second, it’s stupid.  Imagine if we start to call NBA players, by the first letter of their first name, and the first two letters of their last name, we would get names like D-No, B-Bo (Bruce Bowen), and I-Di (Ike Diogu).  It’s dumb and it has to stop.

Speaking of the Mavs, they squeaked by the Suns last night, and it appears the two teams have reverted back to their old ways of not playing any defense.  Until those two teams address that problem, neither of them are beating the Spurs.  Also, remember how I keep harping about trading Amare?  Amare couldn’t even dominate against Dampier or Diop.  Duncan, KG, or Go Get It would’ve slapped those D’s around like Tony Park did to that French model.  By the way, did you hear TP is suing the tabloids for 40 million??  Dont worry, I have my attorneys on stand by.   But seriously, if he didn’t do anything wrong, why go through all the trouble of suing for that much money??  That sounds like someone that got caught and now desperately wants to prove to his newly wedded wife that he did not use some of his quickness on someone else.  Eva, if you are reading this, call me!! I have a Nintendo Wii to give away!!

Let’s move on to the faces of the NBA. 

Both Wade and James were in action last night, and both teams lost.  The Cavs lost to the lowly Knicks, and the Heat lost to the sinking Hawks.  Again, I’ve been saying this for months, but the Cavs need to find a way to move Hughs.  The Cavs looked terrible last night against the Knicks, and they can’t guard anyone.  You know it’s bad when you lose to the Knicks.  I don’t feel bad for the Cavs.  I feel bad for the fans chanting “fire Isiah”; they had to halt the chant…at least for one night…

The outlook looks cold for the Heat.  They not only lost the game last night, but they also lost Alonzo to a tear in the patella tendon.  Alonzo’s career is most likely over, and so is the Heat’s season.  Alonzo was actually playing better basketball than Shaq, and now the Heat is smaller than ever.  The Heat needs some big men, and they should have went after Nazr Mohammed.  Maybe Pat Riley was trying to become of the Suns of the East, but the Heat have a smaller front line than the Suns, and none of their guards can shoot.  Wade can’t do it all.  I know it’s early, but maybe it’s time to start preparing for the lottery.   Eric Gordon, or Michael Beastly Beasley would fit well with Riley’s system.

Some other thoughts from last night…

Rudy Gay hit the game winner against the Spurs last night.  This kid has been unbelievable this year, and all those people that thought the Rockets got the better part of the deal by getting Battier for Gay and Swift might think twice now.  Imagine if the Rockets kept Gay, With McGrady declining, Gay has enough game to replace him.  Gay is long and athletic, and his jump shot mirrors McGrady’s.  I am also willing to bet that he is more durable than T-Mac.  Gay is going to be an All-Star next season, I guarantee it; unless he decides to quit the league because annoying commentators and columnist are calling him R-U Gay?

Speaking of the Rockets, they lost to the Magics last night because they couldn’t execute a play in the closing minutes of a game.  If you didn’t see the game, the Rockets had a chance to tie with 10 seconds left, and they need a three.  So instead of setting picks to get someone open, the Rockets handed the ball to Luther Head so he can create a 3 off the dribble.  Luther Head can shoot, but not off the dribble.  He is more of a catch and shoot guy.  Even worse, Head took a 2 instead of 3.  Needless to say, the Rockets lost, and now they are below .500.  I was one of those guys high on Adelman, and I don’t know what’s wrong with the Rockets.

The two biggest surprises so far this season, the Portland Trailblazers and the Sacramento Kings.  Portland without grandpa Oden is 14-12 and have won 9 straight.  The Kings without Mike Bibby and a new head coach have played extremely well.  Both teams won last night.