Prepare for Drugs, Bikes and the Mountains: Your Tour de France Preview

Men on bikes, drugs -- but not anymore, except yes still pretty much on drugs -- and mountains. France porn via helicopter. Soothing dulcet tones of British announcers. Lance Armstrong. It's the Tour De France! And you probably don't care about cycling! Neither do I, really, but once I became a "full time blogger" (read: "unemployed") a few years ago, I carved out the time to watch the Tour in the background as I went about the blogging. Much to my surprise, I found it somewhat interesting despite cycling's status as perhaps the most objectively boring sport you can watch. Hey: men on bikes! [Four hours pass.] Yep. Still on bikes, those guys. Mostly in one big pack. But when Floyd Landis shot off the front of the field a few years back and pulled off an audacious final-opportunity attack to win the tour, it was simultaneously boring as hell and riveting. (Landis immediately got suspended for doping because that's what always happens.) So ...