Tour de France Riders Forced To Perform Without Mechanical Supplements

The Tour de France tried an "experiment" today—banning radios that allow coaches and team leaders to communicate with their riders during the race. It's almost like they expect these athletes to use their own brains! You see, back in the ye olde times of the early 1990s, cyclists had to make their own calculations and decisions in the middle of a race. Then some kid named Armstrong came along with his cellphone-sponsored walkie-talkie team and won the whole thing and now riders would apparently forget how to pedal if they didn't have someone whispering in their ear all day. So to try and make things interesting, Tour officials have banned the now omnipresent radios for two stages just to see what happens. (So far nothing. Today's stage unfolded exactly the way everyone thought it would.) There was some grumbling about the whole thing, but the good news is that it gave Robin Williams an opportunity to do what he does best—make fun of deaf people. Now...