Dear LT, Westbrook, and/or DeAngelo Williams:

I have all of your backups on my fantasy team, and am therefore writing to request that one of you suffer a devastating, season-ending injury. You can get together and draw straws or play rock-paper-scissors to decide whose season has to end. I think that would be a fair way to do it. I don't think it's too much for me to ask, considering that my RB depth depends upon it. Sure, I have two decent starters already (Alexander and Edge), but what if one of them were to get hurt? How would you feel then? What will you have to say for yourselves when I don't have a good plug-in starter on their bye weeks? You'll feel terrible for not collapsing in a broken pile of bones and sinew when I asked you to (very politely I might add), and I want to save you from that mental anguish. All I'm asking is one snapped ACL - you'll feel a little pop and it'll be over before you know it. You'll even get a cart ride! You know how much you love cart rides! Thank you in advance for your consideration. Sincerely, The guy who owns Turner, Buckhalter, and DeShaun Foster in his fantasy league and is therefore playing the odds that one of you will suffer a very painful injury or family tragedy