DAMN by Marshawn Lynch Re-Written With 3 Semesters of a College Education
For starters, I hate improper grammar. Actually, hate is a strong word. I do not hate improper grammar. It does, however, bother me. And I understand that most of the time it is done subconsciously and we don't really notice. That is fine. It happens. However, I do hate when people use improper grammar intentionally. It demeans them as human beings, making them nothing more than the cats and dogs we have in our homes, because if you cannot communicate properly, and you are a fully functioning human being, than you are nothing more than a house pet. Now, I do not expect this post to be perfect because I know it won't be. I will type too fast and skip a letter or jumble words. I will then go back and fix them so just accept it and enjoy the read. Without further adieu, I present to you: DAMN: Written by Marshawn Lynch: "whats good yardbarkers what it do its ya local neighborhood running back outta OAKLAND....in buffalo playin for da bills...if u looked at da headline reading DAMN its cause ive been out 4 da past two weeks and its been hurting me not to b out der wit ma teammates even if we losing....i just cant wait til i can get back out der wit ma bra bras (teammates).....but dis just ma lil intro until i can get back to yall wit a lil mo....stay solid til next time" Now, for those of us that like to read in English, I present to you: DAMN:Written by Marshawn Lynch and Re-Written by Zach Popp : Good afternoon, everybody(everyone, friends, people, etc.). How is it going? I am Marshawn Lynch, the running back for the Buffalo Bills out of Oakland, California. I decided to title this article DAMN because I have been out for the past couple weeks and it is starting to irritate me. I realize right now we are not doing that well but my team needs me and I want to be out there. I cannot wait until I can go back to practice and be with my teammates. This is really all I have for today. I just wanted to introduce myself and give you guys an update. You guys have a good day and I will keep everyone updated on what is going on up here in Buffalo.
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joltz25 said November 29, 2007
tcbailey24
said November 29, 2007
jzpopp said November 29, 2007
joltz25 said November 29, 2007
tcbailey24
replied November 29, 2007
tcbailey24
said November 29, 2007
fbkid15
replied November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Awesome said November 29, 2007
You both made plenty of errors, but only one of you tried not to.
Who's the fool now?
tcbailey24
replied November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
joltz25 said November 29, 2007
GoBears
replied December 04, 2007
jzpopp replied December 04, 2007
whitejordan32
said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
tcbailey24
replied November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
whitejordan32
replied December 02, 2007
FanProphet
said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Mr_Rosewater replied November 29, 2007
How is that not hating?
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
jzpopp said November 29, 2007
Mr_Rosewater replied November 29, 2007
Not true.
"It demeans them as a human being [because of "them," it should be "human beings" with no article in front of it], making them nothing more than the cats and dogs we have in our homes, because if you cannot communicate properly [there shouldn't be a comma here], and you are a fully functioning [props for not hyphenating a compound modifier that begins with an adverb; can I say "props" or is that too 'hood for you?] human being, than [should be "then"] you are nothing more than a house pet."
Get off your high horse, champ.
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Posted by me: However, I do hate when people use improper grammar intentionally.
Or are you too ignorant to accept the fact that I wrote that sentence? You are trying too hard to demean me and defend someone who refuses to evolve grammatically. Why? Because he is an athlete? Doe that make him better than me?
And I don't own a horse, anymore.
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Stingrizay said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
1.) I know he wrote it like that intentionally. That is whyt he article appalls me. Did you skip the following sentence: "However, I do hate when people use improper grammar intentionally." I wrote that earlier today. It is actually in this article.
2.) I am not from the bay. I am from North Carolina. I have heard enough kids that I went to high school with talk as though they were southern rappers. I know that because I have listened to southern rap and heard interviews. I have been exposed to the dialect.
3.) I go to The University of Arizona. I know alot of students from the bay area. About half of them talk like Mashawn spells. I have known them for 3 semesters now. I am used to hearing them talk. Once again, I am used to the dialect.
4.) His occupation is a Running Back not an English Teacher, right? Yes it is. But it is more than that. He will be making public appearances, talking to children, attending camps. Maybe it is just me but I would like for my child's role model to talk like they have an education. I never said he didn't learn anything or that he was uneducated. I know he is educated. However, Berkeley is supposed to be a good school. He was there for 3 years. He should talk and type like he has some form of higher learning.
With that said, I have a life. I am a college sophomore. I go out with my friends, work, got o class. The typical college lifestyle. So the get a life area is taken care of.
I do plan on becoming a History teacher, of course byt hen the English vocabulary will be completely destroyed so I guess I won't be able to educated most of America. But hey, as long as you are okay with your child talking like they have no education because that is how Marshawn sounds, because now that he is a famous football player, he is a role model and there is no way around it, it's fine by me.
connor said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Ploppity replied December 01, 2007
You are acting like a fool, and the more of your responses I read, the more disgusted I become with you. I hope you realize the error in your ways soon, especially because you are considering a career as an educator and attorney, roles in which arrogance and prejudice are critical character flaws.
jzpopp replied December 01, 2007
UCBWestOakland replied January 10, 2008
what it do? Iz ya boi from da town $-Lynch. Fam 1st and good lookin to all da fanz. Keep it lit/ fa all U haterz i should make work outta ya wife. On da turf!
hahahaha We laughin at ya'll Bitch ass!
Salutations.
P.S. Wut skoo will u get yo degree from?
Just curious.
Taylorized said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Mr_Rosewater replied November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
tcbailey24
replied November 29, 2007
Taylorized said November 29, 2007
japan_jeff said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Isn't it amazing how SOMEONE always says that anyone who writes anything against athletes had to be bad at sports? I was rather good. I improved every year I played. After high school, I moved on to college. I am too small to play college athletics. And I have no vendetta aginst athletes because of their money. I don't want to make the kind of money Marshawn will make. I plan to be a prosecutor and history teacher. And why is it that when someone says anything negative about an athlete they are told to get a life? You try to make it sound like I spent hours on this article. I spent about an hour, that is including corrections. You must remember I am in college. This means I was done with my classes, saw this in CNNSI, and I commented on it. I expect you to say something about me being on at 4:30 in the morning talking about this. Well, you see I have to do alot of studying because I am in college for an education. If I feel like letting of some steam by writing a harmless article after myc lasses, I will. If you are too much of a prick to accept that, I don't care but do not berate me because I find certain things should be addressed.
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
daSHARK79 said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
robbucklives said November 29, 2007
(i pologize f i uz bd grmmr in this post)
Lynch not only went to college...he went to Cal-Berkeley!
So....either Cal-Berekely is a sham for letting him in......or Mr. Lynch is guilty of dumbing down his post to "keep it real" with the boys in Oakland (O-town, for the abbreviators).
I submit that "keeping it real" is the type of behavior that has landed some of our most promising sports stars in the boneyard.
I applaud you for having the courage to swim against the tide of the legions of "jock-sniffers" who applaud like trained seals everytime one of the "Confirmed Athletes" lays down a riff....no matter the quality of the content.
"Word"
UCBWestOakland replied January 10, 2008
what it do? Iz ya boi from da town $-Lynch. Fam 1st and good lookin to all da fanz. Keep it lit/ fa all U haterz i should make work outta ya wife. On da turf!
hahahaha We laughin at ya'll Bitch ass!
Salutations.
P.S. Wut skoo will u get yo degree from?
Just curious.
Shawna said November 29, 2007
suewalcheck replied November 29, 2007
he is being paid to be a role model. any mule can carry a football. we pay our athletes so much because we ask so much of them. do you really think it's because he can average 4.2 yards per carry?
please.
if he doesn't want to be a role model, he can return the very large signing bonus and lead a less public life.
finally...part of what jzpopp was doing is called humor. if marshawn's post was to one extreme.....jzpopp's was to the other extreme. the contradiction of extremes presents an opportunity for satire. for humor.
btw, i just saw marshawn's video with kenny mayne, and it was hilarious. i gve a lot of credit to a guy who can make fun of himself....and maybe that's what he was doing when he wrote the original post.
"shout out to all the brothas in o-town"
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Mr_Rosewater replied November 29, 2007
And suggesting that Marshawn is a mule is messed up.
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
UNGERMAX said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Mr_Rosewater replied November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
UNGERMAX said November 29, 2007
A-rod is a greedy ass but they pay him anyway. Paying athletes for being good role models would be nice but then everyone would suck. Really bad business model.
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
webkid30 said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Shawna said November 29, 2007
jzpopp said November 29, 2007
I would also find it offensive, actually I do find it ofensove, that he wrote his Sean Taylor article the way he did. It is in the same stle as his first post. Surely he wasn't being funny then, was he?
webkid30 replied December 01, 2007
UCBWestOakland replied January 10, 2008
what it do? Iz ya boi from da town $-Lynch. Fam 1st and good lookin to all da fanz. Keep it lit/ fa all U haterz i should make work outta ya wife. On da turf!
hahahaha We laughin at ya'll Bitch ass!
Salutations.
P.S. Wut skoo will u get yo degree from?
Just curious.
Shawna said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
Shawna said November 29, 2007
jzpopp replied November 29, 2007
orions
replied November 30, 2007
Billsman said November 30, 2007
Billsman
Billsman said November 30, 2007
ZackVank said November 30, 2007
Also, the OP had a little exchange with somebody regarding rap being music, and stated that it was his opinion that it wasn't. As somebody who's been in a lot of debates regarding the lines between opinion and fact, I felt like I should point out that by definition, rap is music.
mackinskor said December 02, 2007
I can't believe what I have been reading here.
You make it sound like your "rewrite" was awesome in a grammatical sense and that you are the master blaster, going to college and what-not. Guess what skeezix, that crap you posted we learned in 7th and 8th grade, not college level writing.
Go home.
tcbailey24
replied December 02, 2007
jzpopp replied December 02, 2007
TheDudeAbides said December 02, 2007
jzpopp replied December 02, 2007
orions
replied December 03, 2007
TheTruth said December 03, 2007
jzpopp replied December 03, 2007
grmd61
said December 05, 2007
It is very unfortunate that more people aren't attempting to post using proper grammar and better spelling.
slimmons said December 18, 2007
BISCUIT4 said January 03, 2008
UCBWestOakland replied January 10, 2008
what it do? Iz ya boi from da town $-Lynch. Fam 1st and good lookin to all da fanz. Keep it lit/ fa all U haterz i should make work outta ya wife. On da turf!
hahahaha We laughin at ya'll Bitch ass!
Salutations.
P.S. Wut skoo will u get yo degree from?
Just curious.
UCBWestOakland said January 10, 2008
what it do? Iz ya boi from da town $-Lynch. Fam 1st and good lookin to all da fanz. Keep it lit/ fa all U haterz i should make work outta ya wife. On da turf!
hahahaha We laughin at ya'll Bitch ass!
Salutations.
P.S. Wut skoo will u get yo degree from?
Just curious.