What the Rams need is...

A slogan! Any product worth it’s Morton Salt has turned the corner on their profitability by riding the waves of a catchy slogan. Bounty’s the quicker-picker-upper, Avis tries harder, Energizer keeps going and going and going, Wheaties is the breakfast of Champions, and yeah goddammit – I can hear you NOW.

If the Rams are going to pull out of this myre of mediocrity, they’re going to have to take a page from “America’s Team”, and brand themselves again. The Greatest Show on Turf certainly had its advantages on and off the field, so all we have to do is tap into that positive energy again and all will be right with the world. To that end, I’m going to throw a few slogans out there and hope one sticks. Feel free to comment with your own if you’re so inclined.

Here’s a few quick ones and I’ll put the exclamation on them with an exclamation!
(looks exciting, no?)

The St Louis Rams – We beat ourselves so you don’t have to!
The St Louis Rams – Have 15 on us!
The St Louis Rams – The 4th best team in Missouri!
The St Louis Rams – Namath played for us once!
The St Louis Rams – Three States and counting!
The St Louis Rams – ROFLMFAO!
The St Louis Rams – We’ll always have 99!
The St Louis Rams – Koo Koo for Klopfenstein
The St Louis Rams – Offense is Overrated!
The St Louis Rams – Rebuilding Again!

Ah, nevermind. A few more games like the first two we had and every NFL fan in the world, Lions’ fans included, will come up with plenty of their own.