Dear Beane-face,

No more Swish? Like, seriously? Billy, you stupid piece of over-hyped crap, say it ain't so. I mean, I've read Moneyball, and correct me if I'm wrong here, but I thought we liked the guys who could generate runs. I thought we liked walks (of which Nicky-poo had 100 last season - 6th in the AL). I thought we liked high on-base percentages (like Swishy's career-high .381 last year). Err, I thought we wanted to WIN.

So why the hell are we dealing away one of our best young players when he's still on his way up? Not to mention the fact that he was one of the few reasons that at least a handful of fans showed up to games in '07 (in a pathetic attempt to fill up the half of the stadium that was actually open).

I mean, I thought it was bad before when you gave away Haren, another still-rising young star (15-9 last year, with a 3.07 ERA). But this is just ridiculous. What kind of retarded system are you using to make these decisions?



At this rate, you might as well just pack up and move to an old, boring, dirty suburb where no one will come watch you play. Oh, wait. You're already doing that.




Billy, in summary, I would just like to say GO TO HELL. I don't care if you're "replenishing the farm system, blahblahblah...", you're ruining MY team by getting rid of some of the most promising players, and I hate you for it.

Oh, and did I mention that they were also 2 of the cutest guys on the team? Teehee.

Screw you,

The Sports Biotch