Now I Gotta Root For Jason Bay?

Johnny come lately, the new kid in town. Everybody loves you, so don't let them down. -Eagles Public Service Announcement: Ok, here we go! He's gone, and we couldn't do nothing about it. That's that. There was nothing we could do about it. Real greaseball shit. Manny's a Dodger. Couldn't they have gone into a room? Hashed this thing out. Hashed this thing out like men? Shake hands? Smoke cigars afterwards? Everybody's happy? Nope. Not gonna do it. Not at this juncture. Yes, Manny's a Dodger. I know it's true, oh so true, 'cause I saw it on TV. I saw Linda Cohen on TV. Saw Linda Cohen on the News. ESPN News. Linda Cohen said, "It has now happened. Manny Ramirez. The deal is done." Oh the humanity! If you know me at all, you know I love Manny. You know what I think of him. I think he's meant more to the Red Sox than anyone. Anyone. Past or present. Anyone. The Red Sox will sorely miss this cat. They will miss his 312 batting average. They will miss his 274 bombs. His 868 RBIs. And the two World Series titles he done brung 'em. Know this sports fans, only six players in Major League history can match Manny's Red Sox numbers in the Triple Crown categories while also winning at least two rings during their tenure with one club. Only six. Only Babe, the Iron Horse, Joltin' Joe, Jimmie "the Beast" Foxx, Hank Greenberg and Stan the Man. That's it. That's the list. Pretty good company if you ask me. Hall of Fame company if you ask me. Immortal company if you ask me. Yes folks, the Red Sox will sorely miss this cat, and so will I. Like I missed Freddy Lynn. Like I missed Pudge. Petey. Nomah. The Hit Dog. Like those guys there. Only more so. Those guys there don't got no rings on their fingers. Those guys don't got no bells on their toes. Petey does. One. But still. He's close. He's not Manny. And now, Manny's gone. I'll say one thing. I'll say, if anybody besides Tito can manage Manny, it's Joe Torre. But Joe Torre or no Joe Torre, Manny will continue to rake. He will continue to rake because he's still the best right-handed hitter we've ever seen. The best there's ever been. A big bad baseball machine. The Red Sox had, had, a window of opportunity. You shouldn't grab me, Johnny. My mother grabbed me once...Once! Had a window of opportunity to grab a couple of rings here. Pick a pocket or two boys here. Not now. They ain't pretty no more. Not now. I don't care what you think about Manny's antics. The Red Sox just went down a peg. Down a peg closer to the masses. Closer to the Rays. Closer to the Bombers. Closer to the teams they need to beat. Closer to what we used to be. Lovable losers. No matter how you slice it. No matter how you dice it. Julienne it. The Red Sox yesterday, with Manny, nonsense and all, were better than they are today without him. Just win baby! When you win, nothing hurts. Like my main John Madden always says, "The only yardstick for success our society has is being a champion. No one remembers anything else." They'll remember Manny. This is where we get to see how good Theo and company really are. We get to see if the system truly is greater than the player. Bill Belichick baseball. But even Bill Belichick sometimes goes with a Corey Dillon. Even Bill Belichick sometimes goes with a Randy Moss. Because sometimes, talent makes up for the other stuff. Hall of fame talent makes up for a lot. Championship talent makes up for a lot. It don't mean a thing if you don't get them rings. Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing. Now, here's the rub. The hard part. The Longest Yard part. I'm still a proud member of Red Sox Nation. I pledge allegiance. I'm a company man. I meant what I said, and I said what I meant. An elephant's faithful one hundred percent. All that. If tonight, Jason Bay is roaming left field in Fenway Park against the Oakland Athletics, Jason Bay will be my favorite left fielder in the game of baseball. Period. No questions asked. He's gone, and we couldn't do nothing about it. That's that. There was nothing we could do about it. That's just the way it goes. And so it goes and so it goes and so it goes. But where it's goin', no one knows. Roll Sox, roll! Public Acknowledgements: Goodfellas, Dana Carvey, John Fogerty, Herbert Morrison, Gypsy Rose, Oliver, Johnny Dangerously, Raging Bull, Veg-O-Matic, Al Davis, Joe Namath, Vince Lombardi, Horton and Nick Lowe Peace out Manny. Six Two and Even!