Pedro's First Phillies Start Marred By Idiot Fan's Golden Shower

Just as Pedro Martinez was escaping a jam as the Phillies cruised to a 12-3 fifth inning lead, some jamook in Chicago decided that throwing his beer at center fielder Shane Victorino as he tried to field a fly ball would be just hilarious. It wasn't. It was dangerous, stupid, and downright criminal. I hope said jamook is banned from Wrigley Field for life and arrested for 'assault with a watery Old Style'. I have to apologize, though, for my haste in Tweeting a picture of this poor pudgy chap, whom ESPN fingered for tossing the beer: Turns out he wasn't the perp. My boys in Philly were watching on Comcast and said it was some skinny dude in the front row who committed the grave violation of the Fan Code. Sorry, Chubs!