Soriano: Joker or Jacker or BOTH?

I did some quick math in my head and decided that Soriano has to hit 4 HRs AND steal at least one base for every fly ball he drops.

IF he was still hitting homers - he got one the other night and IF he steals bases - he stole one today and IF he gets on base in the lead-off spot - no signs of this BTW - then he can open up a lemonade stand in left for all I care.

That's a lot of ifs but I do love lemonade...