Originally written December 27, 2012 on Extra Pine Tar:
Urbina_takes_over_93f5
Former MLB closer Ugueth “Uggie” Urbina was released from a Venezuelan prison five and a half years in to his 14 year sentence for trying to make his workers in to human Moltov cocktails and hacking them up with a machete, all because he thought they stole one of his guns. I’ve never been to Venezuelan prison, but I can imagine five and a half years probably felt like 14, and if Uggie was on his best behavior who am I to say he shouldn’t be let out early? My issue here is the reaction that his release has garnered from his former friends and colleagues. The news broke on Twitter with his son tweeting out this picture and saying ”Finally with my father!” I get being excited to see your dad, even if he is a machete wielding lunatic. Family is family, and no amount of violent outbursts will change the fact that Juan Urbina is the fruit of Uggie’s homicidal loins. Soon after the news broke, Bobby Abreu gave his feelings about his being released. “I’m very happy because my buddy is currently free,” Abreu said. “Anyone who knows him well, knows his humanity, regardless of the (incident). I love and respect him a lot.” Humanity? Is it “humane” to do this to another person?   I don’t own a gun, so I can’t say just how I would react if someone stole one from me, but I’d hope that it would be a little more “humane” than this. Maybe I’m missing the point. Urbina has apparently served his debt to society, so who am I to take issue with people – especially his friends – being happy that he’s out. Uggie was a closer who thrived off his emotions, he could have very easily gotten carried away that day. Everyone loses control of their emotions from time to time, but usually that doesn’t result in chasing your workers around the family compound with a can of gasoline and a tool used for clearing a trail through the jungle. The best part about the whole story is that while he was in prison he continued to pitch. With reports saying that he has been clocked over 90mph. This prompted reporters to ask his former Venezuelan team GM whether or not Urbina still had a place on the team now that he was a free man. Juan Vicente Zerpa, manager of the Leones de Caracas of the Venezuelan winter league, said he would “welcome” Urbina on his team. “He already paid his debt to society,” Zerpa said. “This is his home; our doors are open to Ugueth Urbina. He is a Lion.” If Uguie Urbina is a lion then he’s much more like the Tsavo Man Eaters from the movie Ghost in the Darkness than Christian the Lion. All I’m saying is if you see Uguie Urbina at a gas station near you – be careful. Lion’s, no matter how well trained, have a natural inclination towards violence.
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Royals beat A's in extras, win first playoff game since '85

Mark Davis: Raiders head coaching job will be 'enticing'

Fan on Craigslist offers Nats playoff tickets for threesome

Brady snubs rookie Garoppolo after touchdown pass

Cung Le suspended for failed HGH test

FCC Chairman: Washington nickname 'inappropriate today'

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Brain study finds 76 of 79 deceased NFL players had CTE

Tony Sparano to step in as Raiders head coach

Eli on Geno Smith: If fans yell at you, you probably deserve it

49ers players come out in support of Jim Harbaugh

Raiders reportedly expected to make a run at Jon Gruden

FCC unanimously ends sports blackout rule

MLB.com posts wrong story saying A's won game

WATCH: Brett Favre in new nose hair trimmer commercial

WATCH: Michigan students protest, call for AD to be fired

Marlins president: We're not trading Giancarlo Stanton

Heckling Knicks fan suing team over ejection

This weekend in NFL stupid

Kobe: Iggy Azalea has had better career than Swaggy P

College football's post-Week 5 playoff projection

Oregon to don pink-themed unis for breast cancer awareness

Is DeMarco Murray the best RB in the NFL?

WATCH: TBS sends up 'Boom Goes the Dynamite' with promo

Ilya Bryzgalov takes photos with fans while on the bench

Dodgers News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

WATCH: Brett Favre in new commercial

Brady snubs rookie after TD pass

FCC: Washington nickname 'inappropriate today'

Could Jon Gruden return to Oakland?

Marlins: We're not trading Stanton

Study: 76 of 79 deceased NFL players had CTE

Heckling fan sues Knicks over ejection

Sparano to step in as Raiders head coach

This weekend in NFL stupid

Kobe chooses Iggy over Swaggy P

Is DeMarco Murray the NFL's best RB?

Ilya Bryzgalov takes photos with fans while on the bench

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.