ZOMG MAJAH DRAMZZ

Oh My Gaga! Did you see The Hills premiere?

Sure, the NCAA Men's Basketball Championship was on, but seriously, who thought MSU was going to stay close to UNC? (cough...me)

While MSU was going their best General Motors impression by crapping out in Detroit, it was LAURENS SUPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!! Evidently, Lauren, Lo, Audrina, lame-ass Franky and Brody held none of their earnings in the market and sagaciously invested in low-yield CDs because they seem to be recession proof.

Lauren had her 23rd 24th 25th birthday on a yacht where there was gambling, drankin', and of course a boatload of drama (pun intended).

Heidi came along with Stephanie to the suprise party, and once Lauren saw Spencer's better half, she sorta made the face of when you get the watery taste in your mouth right before you barf.

While Heidi and L.C. (or "Queen Bee-yotch" as refered to by Spencer) were making an akward pie on the boat, Spencer and the guy that the MTV producers casted to be his wingman went for a boy's night out. Spencer was hitting on the bartender while Stephanie's ex-bf Cameron was watching. Cameron, unaware of the G-code, snitched on Spencer via txt to BB pin#347434532a and Heidi found out through Stephanie. Heidi then expressed her feelings to Spencer through a carefully-plotted series of emotiocons such as ;/ and :( .

Spencer confronted Cameron, possibly creating a fight between the most WASPy suburbanite upper-class first names ever. Suprisingly, Spence got a few good rips in and kinda kicked some ass (We learned in the second episode after that Spencer is a purple belt in Jiu-Jitsu, only 3 belts behind Michael Westbrook [ed. note: it has been made clear to me that Westbrook is a brown belt in Brazillian Jiu-Jitsu, which basically means he wears a thong while fighting). Oh and notice at 0:48, Spencer turns into Randy Jackson, dawg.



So this of course set off a long strain of Spencer's sarcastic, non-chalant responses to Heidi's character examinations, and the old "I'M GOING TO COLORADO" response from Heidi. Lauren is pissed that Steph brought Heidi along, saying "You can't force someone onto someone else. It's not fair." Evidently, Lauren has been too consumed with recent examinations of law in Afganistan lately.