Come on, DeMar DeRozan and Ed Davis. You know that if there's one thing I hate, it's a sneak, and if there's two things I hate, it's a pair of sneaks who are sneaking around trying to find their presents before Christmas. If you can't act nice, and instead are going to act like naughty sneaks, then maybe you won't get any presents this year. Is that what you want? Because there are a lot of kids all over Canada who might actually appreciate getting gifts enough to not be all sneaking and creeping about it. Think I'm kidding? Keep it up, guys.
I swear, sometimes you young Toronto Raptors make it hard for me to stay in the spirit of the season. I really do swear.
Also, what are you even thinking about in your sneaking technique (maybe techsnique?)? You are a combined 161 inches tall and you are crawling around in the middle of the floor in a well-lit room. Did you really think we weren't going to see you? That's ridiculous.
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