Originally written on Rumors and Rants  |  Last updated 9/27/13

The most memorable injuries in sports history are the ones that occurred off the field. Lions receiver Nate Burleson joined that elite category this week when he broke his arm in a car crash that happened as he reached over to grab a pizza that was falling out of the passenger seat. No word on whether he made the catch, but certainly football is more his life calling than pizza delivery. Detroit’s top target not named Calvin Johnson will be out until November. But where does his injury rank among the all-time greats sustained in an off-field incident? You be the judge. Plaxico Burress: The Giants wideout shot himself in the leg while at a nightclub. But it wasn’t the injury that kept him off the field — it was the insult. Burress had to go to jail for illegally carrying the firearm. This story is hard to top, though technically the injury itself did not cost him any playing time. Glenallen Hill: Glenallen Hill is a BAD mofo, as his home run onto the top of a Wrigley Field rooftop once proved. But even the toughest guys have fears. His is spiders, and they once put him on the DL. Sadly, they weren’t even real ones. While he was playing for the Blue Jays, Hill jumped out of bed while having a nightmare about spiders. In his attempt to get away from said spiders, he fell through a glass table. Joel Zumaya: The Tigers relief pitcher missed three games in the 2006 ALCS due to a wrist injury suffered because he was playing too much Guitar Hero. Chris Hanson: As a symbolic gesture, Jaguars coach Jack Del Rio kept an axe and tree stump in Jacksonville’s locker room to encourage his team to “keep chopping the wood.” Perhaps something simpler would have sufficed. Punter Hanson decided one day to literally chop the wood, and ended up getting a piece of his leg instead. He missed six weeks. Clint Barmes: Todd Helton is being feted this week for his role as the greatest Rockie in history, but he once accidentally contributed to wrecking the career of another. Barmes was a promising Rockies rookie in 2005 until he fell down the stairs carrying a package of deer meat given to him by Helton as a gift. He broke his collar bone and missed the rest of the year. Though he is still in the bigs, Barmes has only eclipsed his rookie batting average of .289 one time. Adam Eaton: The Padres pitcher stabbed himself with a knife while opening a DVD in 2001, forcing him to miss a start. The sad thing is no one seems to have bothered finding out what movie it was. Sammy Sosa: In his final season with the Cubs — one which saw the team with a far more loaded lineup than the ’03 edition that finished five outs from a World Series berth — Sosa missed a month when he threw out his back sneezing. Kyle Farnsworth: Sosa’s sneeze wasn’t even the oddest ailment to strike a Cub in 2004. That award goes to Kyle Farnsworth, who went on the DL after kicking a fan. Not a human fan. An electric fan in the runway between the Cubs dugout and the clubhouse. Francisco Rodriguez: K-Rod ended up on the DL after tearing a thumb ligament on his throwing hand after punching his father-in-law. Everyone knows you should punch your father-in-law with your non-throwing hand. Geez. Marty Cordova: The Orioles outfielder had to miss a game after falling asleep in a tanning bed the previous day. Jeff Kent: The Giants second baseman claimed to break his wrist while washing his truck. As it turns out, it actually happened when he was popping wheelies on his motorcycle, which was prohibited in his contract. Amar’e Stoudamire: The Knicks forward punched a glass fire extinguisher case following a playoff loss to the Heat. The extinguisher won.

GET THE YARDBARKER APP:
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Trent Richards has 50-50 chance at making Raiders roster

Rex Ryan takes subtle jabs at Jets' upper management

Everett Golson responds to Paul Finebaum's criticism

Mark Sanchez says it ‘crazy’ to call Chip Kelly racist

Malcolm Butler daring Brady to throw his way in practice

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Geno Smith confident worst is behind him and the Jets

Ronda Rousey knocks out Bethe Correia in 34 seconds

Von Miller earns dismissal from NFL’s drug program

Ian Kennedy watches birth of daughter on FaceTime before start

Matt Williams wants Bryce Harper to stop getting ejected

Five most underrated players in the NFL

WATCH: Dez Bryant throws punches at training camp

There's no need for Notre Dame to join a conference

WATCH: Benches clear during Royals-Blue Jays game

Jim Harbaugh gives Nicki Minaj a shoutout on Twitter

The Kardashian sisters still call Caitlyn Jenner 'Bruce'

Tennessee fan recreates Neyland Stadium in backyard

Lolo Jones: I could last at least a minute against Rousey

Bears have very strict rules for media during training camp

Jamaal Charles: I feel like I'm the LeBron James of football

Ronda Rousey: I'll fight Cyborg if she stops taking steroids

Danny Garcia beats Paulie Malignaggi, remains undefeated

Bobby Wagner, Seahawks agree to contract extension

NFL News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
the YARDBARKER app
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

Notre Dame doesn't need a conference

Rex takes jabs at Jets' management

Sanchez: It's 'crazy' to call Chip racist

Ronda Rousey calls out Cyborg

Five most underrated players in the NFL

Five potential NFL salary cap casualties this preseason

Winners and losers of the 2015 MLB trade deadline

Pirates do Pirates at deadline: Neat little moves

Mets acquire Cespedes from Tigers

Ranking the NFL’s 32 head coaches

Five worst baseball trades since 2000

Examining the state of the NFL

Today's Best Stuff
For Publishers
Company Info
Help
Follow Yardbarker