Originally posted on Chicks in the Huddle  |  Last updated 9/13/13
Chicks, I’ll admit it. I found myself catching the vapors last night. And not just because Tom Brady looked like he might slit his wrist with a Gillette razor if a receiver dropped another pass. It was that fellow, nay, that warrior on the Jets sideline, distracting me in all his slimmer, yet still fleshy glory. It was that tan hunk of man known to the masses as Rex Ryan. Who knew that underneath those hundreds of pounds of flesh and swagger, lie a pretty handsome dude? Sure he revealed his new figure months ago, but there was something about seeing him on the sidelines, full of rage and sadness that he coached the Jets, that got me all hot and bothered. Just look at him! Almost makes me wish he had a weird tattoo of me in a Drew Brees jersey on his upper right thigh. (You know you want one, you sick, sexy bastard!) Had he walked to the opposing sideline and kicked that whining Tom Brady square in the sack, I swear I wouldn’t have been able to control myself. Maybe his brother Rob will get the urge to shed the pounds, too. Nola Chick could use the extra eye-candy on Sundays.*** ***Note: This post was written under the influence of a prescription drug cocktail.
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

Rams WR Stedman Bailey in hospital after being shot in head

Furious Brad Stevens blasts Celtics after lackluster game

Did Bryce Harper deserve the MVP?

Duke 5-star commit posts moving message after successful surgery

Ex-LSU commit still supports Les Miles

Report: Ray Lewis gave Bills pregame pep talk


Report: Marshawn Lynch out a few weeks to recover

Peyton Manning to miss at least two more weeks

Notre Dame DT: Committee 'spit in our faces' with ranking

LaRon Landry suspended indefinitely by NFL

Don’t blame Mike Pettine for benching Johnny Manziel. Blame Johnny.

Danny Ainge: Celtics’ Marcus Smart has shown ‘propensity to get injured’

WATCH: College basketball player makes 3-pointer while wobbly from concussion

The five most overrated teams in the Week 13 coaches' poll

Clemson WR calls South Carolina fans 'rude'

Jonathan Lucroy trade market bolstered by weak catching market

Michigan State lists two starting QBs on depth chart

10 storylines for Week 13 of the college football season

LISTEN: Browns fan cries on radio while ripping Johnny Manziel

Texas A&M QB Kyle Allen says he was injured vs. Alabama

Report: Maple Leafs are no longer the NHL’s most valuable franchise

Ranking the 10 best games of 2015 college football rivalry week

Did a Chipotle employee convince Danny Ainge to trade for Isaiah Thomas?

Bud Black joins Angels organization as special assistant to GM

Ben Simmons, Henry Ellenson excelled in freshman vs. freshman battle

NFL News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

The five most overrated teams in the Week 13 coaches' poll

10 storylines for Week 13 of the college football season

Ranking the 10 best games of 2015 college football rivalry week

Examining the Mavericks' hot start

Johnny Bench(ed): Manziel demoted to third string

Mike Trout, four years in

Tom Brady on ‘Rex Ryan!’ line call: It’s ‘in the playbook’

Five NFL teams trending downward

Not so fast, USC: Eagles Chip Kelly buys Philly-area home

The five best hockey fights from Week 7

Today's Best Stuff
For Publishers
Company Info
Follow Yardbarker