Found March 16, 2013 on Kukla's Korner:
In a stunning decision from the NHL front office in Pittsburgh, midget commissioner Gary.Ass Bettman announced just moments ago that Sidney Crosby has been named Cosmopolitan Magazine's Man of the Decade and that the NHL playoffs will start this evening. First round matchups will be announced thirty minutes before game times.  If any visiting team can't make it to their scheduled game, that round will be postponed until the new glossy Crosby posters have been completely reviewed in Bettman's private office, with soft lighting. None of that is true, except the part about Bettman being a midget, the Cosmo award for Rosby, the poster thing and the soft lighting.  So, the playoffs aren't really starting tonite. But if they were? Continue reading "All Is Well…Gary Says The Playoffs Start Tonite"
THE BACKYARD
BEST OF MAXIM
RELATED ARTICLES

‘Ugly’ Goal Propels Penguins Past Bruins in St. Patrick’s Day Matinee (Video)

The Pittsburgh Penguins are known for their explosive offense, but Sunday’s tilt with the Bruins was a defensive affair. The two teams combined for just three goals, and the game-winner came courtesy of an unlikely source. Northeastern alum Joe Vitale scored for just the sixth time in his NHL career — and the first time since last February — with 32 seconds remaining in the...

Penguins History: Bob Paradise

It might come as a surprise for Penguins fans to learn that a Hall-of-Fame defenseman skated for the team in the mid-to-late 1970s. No, it wasn’t shot-blocker extraordinaire Dave Burrows or even Norris Trophy winner Randy Carlyle. His name was Bob Paradise, and he was inducted into the United States Hockey Hall of Fame in 1989. (...)Read the rest of Penguins History: Bob Paradise...

Fleury leads Penguins in shutout

Marc-Andre Fleury couldn't help it. With the Pittsburgh Penguins' franchise record for career shutouts in sight late in the third period against the New York Rangers on Saturday, the talented if occasionally erratic goalie let his mind drift. ''I wanted it so bad,'' Fleury said. ''I tried to not jinx it. I was touching wood, but yeah I was looking...

Penguins Have Seen This Fish Before

Looks familiar, doesn't it? As another spring is (barely) inching closer by the day, the Penguins are on yet another roll, winners of nine straight.  The Pens' first line of Kunitz/Crosby/Dupuis are playing out of their minds.  Even their defense, which was much maligned not very long ago, is playing much, much better. And all this recently without Evgeni Malkin. ...

Rangers-Penguins Preview

While many expected a tight race in the Atlantic Division, Sidney Crosby and the Pittsburgh Penguins appear to be head and shoulders above the competition. That shouldn't come as much of a surprise to the New York Rangers. Hoping to stay unbeaten in March, Pittsburgh tries for a seventh consecutive victory over New York as these division rivals square off in a matinee showdown...

Bruins Suffer ‘Steel City Stumble’ Against Penguins Despite Strong Effort Against Tough Foe (Video)

The Bruins faced a tough test against the Penguins on Sunday. Unfortunately, they didn’t quite make the grade. Despite a strong effort and a late push to even things up, Boston couldn’t find a way to break through against a stingy Pittsburgh defense. Tomas Vokoun made 31 saves in a strong performance, Sidney Crosby scored a goal and generally, the Penguins just looked better...

Penguins beat Rangers 3-0 for 8th straight win

Marc-Andre Fleury stopped 23 shots to break a tie for Pittsburgh's career shutout record with 23, and the Penguins beat the New York Rangers 3-0 on Saturday for their eighth straight victory. Beau Bennett, Pascal Dupuis and Tyler Kennedy scored, and Dustin Jeffrey added two assists as the Penguins continued to dominate the reeling Rangers. Pittsburgh has won seven consecutive...

Penguins vs Bruins: Beasts of the East

[caption id="attachment_58714" align="alignnone" width="620"] The Pittsburgh Penguins and Boston Bruins are the Beasts of the East right now.[/caption]     It's hard to imagine a better matchup to have than the Pittsburgh Penguins taking on the Boston Bruins. Why? Because both these teams are displaying why they are at the top of the Eastern Conference...

Pittsburgh Penguins Gameday 30 - Boston Bruins

Boston Bruins (19-4-3) @ Pittsburgh Penguins (21-8-0) NBC, NHLN-CA, RDS - 12:30 pm/et Consol Energy Center - Pittsburgh, PA We imagine that someone scheduled this Penguins/Bruins game for 12:30pm on St. Patrick's Day and then laughed. Season Series: 1-0-0 Last meeting that counted: March 12, 2013. Penguins won 3-2. What we said...

Rangers 0, Penguins 3

The Rangers fell to the Pittsburgh Penguins today by the score of 3-0. For a box score, click here. Observations: Little to no positives to take away from today's game... looked like a typical Rangers-Pens game to me.  If not for Hank, the Rangers are probably looking at a 4-0 deficit after one and possibly Glen Sather working the phones in a room somewhere, if...

Video- Can You Have Highlight Passes?

If the answer is yes, check out Sidney Crosby's pass to Pascal Dupuis tonight.  

About Last Night…Penguins Make It 9 Straight Wins

Sidney Crosby and Joe Vitale scored for the Penguins as they came away with a 2-1 win over Boston, their ninth straight victory. Tomas Vokoun made 31 saves in the win and only allowed Tyler Seguin’s 1oth goal of the season to Boston. SPIN: Pittsburgh took over the top spot in the Eastern Conference even as Evgeni Malkin missed his fifth straight game. Defenseman Kris Letang wasn’t...

RECAP: The LOLs of March. PENS WIN.

  Wow.   When you think of this game, this screenshot is all you need: Butthurt. He was having a great night. In two minutes, he went from getting a boner and running home to check Pension Plan Puppets to getting trolled in his favorite team's building by a little boy. FEELINGS The Penguins, most notably the first line, can't lose...
Penguins News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.