Originally written on Blackhawks Down Low  |  Last updated 11/6/11

Oh, the Canucks. Hey, losers. What's new?

Oh, wait, I can think of something new: You’re looking at our sexy asses sitting pretty in first place in the conference while you’re hanging out in 11th. But that’s not really a big deal. I mean, we’re only a dozen or so games in.

That two game losing streak you guys are on is pretty awesome. Who’d you lose to again? The Wild & Blues? LOL. Yeah, sure, the Wild have gotten off to a pretty damn good start, but, really? The Wild? Okay then.

What else is new, guys? Luongo’s stats? A 3.19 GAA and a .884 SV%? That’s not really new, at least not to us. We’re pretty used to seeing that honestly. And in actuality, a 3.19 GAA would be welcome for the Canucks against the Hawks.

You might want to give Alex “Hungry Hungry Hippo” Burrows a heads up that he’ll have to figure out who’s hair he’d like to pull on since Duncan Keith is taking another night off tonight.



Hmm, let’s see, what else...Manny Malhotra is a -10? Yowsas. Isn’t he supposed to be a defensive specialist? I guess not.

Hey, quick question from Dan Carcillo, is Raffi Torres still around? No? He’s too busy being successful in Phoenix? Huh. Okay.

I guess there is one bright spot for you guys, that Sami Salo is the leading point scorer among one-nutted defensemen. Good for you, Chief.

I think it’s adorable that you think this is some sort of “revenge” game for the Hawks. You think we’re still brooding over the “tragic” end to our playoffs last season? Nah. It’s cool. Next to sending your asses home and going on to win the Cup ourselves, watching you come sooooo close just to fail yet again was pretty awesome.

I just read that Burrows & Salo are both out today. Meh. At least Lapierre is still hanging around for us to beat up and laugh at.

Jeez, I haven’t even mentioned The Twins. Whatever. Bolland is anxiously awaiting you.

So as far as real analysis: if the Hawks stay out of the box, they’ll win.

And with that, let’s get down to business and start the amateur hour that is Canucks hockey.

[youtube]oau9gtG5Om8[/youtube]

GET THE YARDBARKER APP:
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Jerry Jones supports Joseph Randle as Cowboys’ starting RB

Dallas Cowboys place Darren McFadden on PUP list

Mark Cuban: Brady suspension should be more severe

Darrelle Revis thinks AFC East will be NFL’s toughest division

David Price traded to Blue Jays

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Joey Bosa among four OSU players suspended for opener

NFLPA: NFL didn't respond to Tom Brady settlement offer

Tom Coughlin calls Jason Pierre-Paul situation a ‘fiasco’

Cole Hamels chose Rangers over Astros

Tom Brady lawsuit transferred from Minnesota to Manhattan

LeGarrette Blount failed conditioning test

Spurs Jesus catches burglar, holds him down for police

Will the San Francisco Giants end up standing pat?

Puig: Broke out of slump by playing baseball video games

Braves dump risk, exchange it for risk

Cole Hamels deal: What is the true price of rebuilding?

William ‘Refrigerator’ Perry auctioning off Super Bowl ring

Affairs of the Hart (Trophy)

The indefensible Hulk Hogan

Terry Collins writes letter to widow of longtime Mets fan

Jets fans fly "Cheaters Look Up" banner over Patriots practice

Dodgers upgrade rotation in unexpected, intelligent way

For some NFL players, life begins at undrafted

NHL News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
the YARDBARKER app
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

Will the Giants end up standing pat?

Puig: Broke out of slump by playing baseball video games

Braves dump risk, exchange it for risk

David Price traded to Blue Jays

The indefensible Hulk Hogan

Cole Hamels chose Rangers over Astros

Can Preller fix the mess in San Diego?

Next summer's top 10 NBA free agents

Who is the NL's new top shortstop?

Cardinals HC Bruce Arians calls Jen Welter a 'trailblazer'

Mets still act like a small-market team

Tom Brady: I did nothing wrong

Today's Best Stuff
For Publishers
Company Info
Help
Follow Yardbarker