Steroids & Subprimes

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 10:22:06 -0500

Why the Steroid Era and the Subprime Mortgage Crisis are (Pretty Much) Exactly the Same Thing In our new feature "From the SandJ Archives", we giddily throw the spotlight on the comedy inherent in reading old features about Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, et al which are hilarious now in that they scream out the question "How was it not obvious!" I mean, it's not like steroids snuck up on us. Lenny Dykstra showed up at training camp looking like "The Thing" in 1993. Brady Anderson hit fifty dingers in 1996. Most informed sports fans knew that steroids existed. But, for some reason, there we all were in the "feel-good" summer of 1998 cheering on Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa, two sideshow freaks bearing no physical resemblance to themselves five years prior as they proceeded to obliterate one of baseball's most hallowed records. Hindsight, as we all know, is 20/20, but now that the United States Congress, eighty-six Mitchell Report players, and a then fifteen year-old country singer have been wrapped up in this circus, people need to begin coming to terms with how to account for an entire generation of our national pastime that now needs to be explained to our grandchildren. And when I say "how to account", I of course mean "who to blame"... http://www.sportsandjokes.com/id21.html

Caption Contest Winner

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 08:41:22 -0500

Would you and three of your friends like to attend Major League Baseball's All-Star Game in Yankee Stadium next month? Would you like $1000? Would you like a free dinner and show on Broadway, on the off chance you're dumb enough to bring your wife? How about a chance to tell one of the finalists in the Home Run Derby where to hit a homer, and getting a Chevy Tahoe Hybrid and 2009 season tickets to the team of your choice if he comes through?

Click the picture above and enter the State Farm Call Your Shot contest. You might win all that and more.

In order to promote the contest, State Farm provided us with a $50 MLB.com gift card. Since there are four of us, and we didn't want to kill Jeremy over his perverted desire to own Nationals' gear, we decided it was best to give the card away as a prize.

We asked you to come up with the best caption for this photo:

Brady Anderson has had difficulty maintaining his playing weight

Gerard Cosloy, of Can't Stop the Bleeding, was the winner.

Other excellent entries:

In Bizarro World, Robin is the epitome of heterosexuality (Josh Walters)

Don't swear off the Orioles, son. You see between the utility belt, bulletproof suit, and the Batmobile much of Batman's power was artificial too. (Mike "Big Tuna" Yates)

So what have you got, kid? Lou Gehrig's? (Benjamin Singer)

Some day you'll be as tall as Earl Weaver, Robin. (Eric Kilhefner)

Ironman and Batman relax after beating Superman and Aquaman in the Finals of the Annual Superhero Double Dutch Jump Roping Competition (Gary Almeter)

Actually, I'm Kevin Costner's kid. (Unsilent Majority)

something magic happens

The true reason for Cal's troubles with his wife: he found his real, true love in this fine strapping young gentleman. (Michael Prodanovich)

every time you go

Best entry by a girl who couldn't pick Cal Ripken out of a two-man lineup:

After the Tanorexia/Down Syndrome benefit, Marvel Studios nixed the Ironman/Batman crossover project. (Sarah Gould)

Thanks to all who entered. Hopefully we'll have more contests like this in the future (with better pictures).

Yardbarker: Brady Anderson

Steroids & Subprimes

Caption Contest Winner