http://www.yardbarker.com/users/boogerking Recent Yardbarker Articles: boogerking en-us Here you go LILEAGLE!!! I filed this where no one will ever find it. Wed, 20 Aug 2008 15:32:48 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/309770 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/309770 I can't f-ing believe I have to post ANOTHER article about a "potential trade" involving an Arizona wideout. Phoenix is the perfect city setting for the latest #1 WR hopes to rise from the ashes and send unrealistic Eagles fans into TD mania. The facts: Boldin is not thrilled about playing out his current contract for the Cardinals. He is under contract for three more seasons. He is aging and his total receptions and yardage stats have declined slightly each of his last three seasons. This may be due to Fitzgerald's growing talents or lousy QBs. He is NOT the #1 WR in AZ. He is represented by Drew Rosenhaus who has been badgering the team all summer long for a new contract and now a trade. The Cardinals insist they will not trade, mirroring the scenario played out in spring with Larry Fitzgerald. They did not trade Fitzgerald. They had enough money to redo his contract despite the rumors to the contrary. The Cards insist they will redo Boldins contract. The Rumor: Boldin and his agent Drew Rosenhaus are going to force AZ to trade Boldin to (drumroll,please...........................) THE EAGLES!! Why it wont happen: Believe the Cardinals when they say they wont trade.They just went through this with Fitzgerald and are confident they can achieve the same results with Boldin. Even if the Cardinals would decide to let him go for a reasonable trade offer Boldin will demand a new contract from his new team before he sets foot on the field. Ultimately he would prove much too expensive and the Eagles probably aren't thrilled with the idea of negotiating with another Rosenhaus WR client who has already made a negative impact on his team in pre-season. Lastly, plugging names into an offense doesn't necessarily make it better. We do not run a style of offense that emphasizes throwing the ball deep in order to move downfield. Again, we do not have trouble moving the ball downfield. Unless Boldin can play tight end the resulting change in our redzone capabilities is minimal. Wed, 20 Aug 2008 12:01:09 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/309639 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/309639 During the middle of last night's win over the Nats the TV broadcast featured quotes from Phillies hitting coach Milt Thompson. He had this to say, "...I've never coached a team where the players underachieved their capabilities the way these players have this year." Gee, Milt, I agree in principle but aren't you the HITTING COACH?!?! Is it not Milt's job to help not only the veterans get out of slumps but also to facilitate the transition to the Majors for our younger players? I guess Bruntlett would not be an example of Milt Thompson's expert coaching techniques. Two years with Ryan Howard and every pitcher in the league still knows exactly what to throw to strike him out. Not to mention we have one of the worst lead off bats in the NL this year. Milt Thompson,like Jimmy Rollins, should probably stop giving interviews. Wed, 20 Aug 2008 11:33:06 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/309622 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/309622 I've been called one.Maybe you have,too.Best I can tell calling someone a hater is a last ditch effort to subdue a detractor when you have nowhere else to go with your argument.Example: I say Donovan McNabb is overvalued by the Philadelphia fanbase. You say I'm a hater. Now exactly what information is conveyed by the arguing statement " You are a hater" ? Certainly there is no explanation as to why I might be wrong.You could even argue that my statement doesn't offer a complex enough opinion to start a real debate. Let's look at another example: Favre sucks for reeking havoc on the Packers off-season preparations. --- You suck.Favre is awesome.You're just a hater. Here you see a clear opinion based on the results of Favre's actions this summer. The rebuttal contains no specific argument short of applying the hater label on the first speaker due to a lack of agreement.Those who use the term feel there is a certain aspect of finallity to an argument once someone is determined to be a "hater".It is as if there is no reason to continue debating an issue because the "hater" will only offer non-sensical comments that are based in poor logic. It is my belief that the insertion of the hater argument into a debate does indeed close the discussion but not in favor of the person making the hater accusation.In fact, the lack of substance within the "you are a hater" rebuttal indicates a clear victory to the accused.In short, if you call someone a hater you probably should turn off the TV and pick up a book.It will help you become a more effective debater. Mon, 18 Aug 2008 16:05:22 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/308172 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/308172 Thanks to GM Carson and the 700 Level blog for providing a morale boost at the right time.After checking out this Utley poster I was compelled to forge on in the battle of the NL East instead of giving up hope and focusing on how much I hate Jimmy Rollins right now.This is a magnificent piece of art that stirs the part of my soul that still gives a crap whether the Phillies win or lose.This morning was a time to gripe and bemoan and hate. Tonight will be a time to rally against a weak enemy and gather momemtum.For we face the ultimate of evils soon: a two game series against the NY Mets.Forget Rollins and his treasonous remarks.Let us rally around a man who has yet to piss us off.I'm with ya' Chase.Let's go!! Fri, 15 Aug 2008 14:44:54 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/306723 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/306723 What would you expect from a bag of s*it? Not much in the way of baseball, right? Maybe just a bad odor. What would you expect from Jimmy Rollins? A decent leadoff batting average.Clutch hitting. Stolen bases out the wazoo. A good attendance record at least? Why allow for constant disappointment and of late, verbal abuse that puts the blame for failure squarely on you? Trading Rollins for a bag of s*it not only prevents further accusations of being the "worst fans in the world" but also lowers expectations below the threshold for disappointment. I imagine you can get a pretty decent size bag of s*it from the Philly Zoo so it wouldn't even be hard on Jimmy's personal life. In exchange, the Zoo recieves a new specimen for the aviary: a future St. Louis Cardinal. Thu, 14 Aug 2008 15:22:22 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/306081 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/306081 Adding insult to the injury of yet another loss, J-Roll grabbed Ryan Howard and went to an interview where they became the 10265th athletes to blame crappy fans for their shi**y play on the field. Rollins openly wondered what it's like to play in the magical city of St.Louis where no one is ever,ever angry about losing or getting caught with steroids (suck it,Ankiel ! ). As a Cardinal you can even whine about your own team until you get traded to the Blue Jays and folks will still applaud your efforts. Yes, a wonderland of low-expectations and endless praise for mediocrity.Ryan Howard echoed these sentiments like the guy from Robbins 8th and Walnut, adding a resounding "yeaahhh! " to Rollins' statements. Well guess what Jimmy? You can take the King of K and move to Missourii, you ungrateful prick. Fans have done nothing but support you and you repay that with being late to the Mets game, walking around the bases, and now blaming the fans for making it difficult to succeed. 0-5 in a third straight losing effort is going to get you booed no matter who you are. Unless you play for the Cardinals. Great. So go there, a**hole. Thu, 14 Aug 2008 12:03:33 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/305964 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/305964 Thanks to California for being so far away.Now I have to be angry in the wee small hours of the morning,breaking the peaceful night with cries of dispair and boisterous expletives.Truthfully I should have turned the game off after the fourth inning and Kyle Kendrick's implosion.Wonder if we'll hear about some mysterious shoulder soreness tomorrow.Brett Myers is probably feeling very smug right about now.That thought turns my stomach.Les Walrond didn't give up any of the eight LA runs though.I guess that's something.See, I told you we're a lousy team.Wonder what else is on......................oh f*ck yeah, indoor volleyball reruns.Awesome. Tue, 12 Aug 2008 00:27:01 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/304240 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/304240 Perhaps the Chinese govt. just acts as a focal point for my loathing of the olympics.Maybe I'd still make fun of the games if they were in an innocuous country such as Canada or New Zealand. We'll never know because the IOC selected the largest proponent of human suffering in the history of mankind to play it cool for two weeks so a handful of freaks can compete in sports that go largely unnoticed for three years and 351 days before being reintroduced as something all good patriots should really care about.What a joke!! Aside from the cruel irony of athletes competeing in uniforms and shoes made by slaves (imagine how this must feel to the Chinese athletes) there lies a larger threat to the free world in China's attempts to showcase Beijing as a civilized place that might be fun to visit.If they succeed in fooling the world with this ruse it will lessen the interest in monitoring China's horrendous human rights record. Everyone, including athletes and even those who simply watch the events, involved with the Olympics in Beijing is doing China a favor by helping to achieve the goal of making this horrible nation seem tolerable.In my opinion the IOC may as well have picked Sudan or Rwanda as the site for this year's games. In addition to furthering the abuse of millions (billions?) there is a domestic cause that all US citizens should acknowledge as reason enough not to support the Beijing games.China has succeeded in stealing the remaining vestiges of US industry.Just try to buy anything that isn't in some way connected to SE Asia's manufacturing and distribution forces.Go on,I dare ya! A third reason to consider not watching is that the evnts themselves are hopelessly boring.Apparantly no one involved in javelin throwing,fencing,budokan,boxing,weightlifting,shotput, or any interesting sport not seen on a daily basis is photogenic enough to make a TV hero out of.Instead we get to see the drama unfold in events like gymnastics where success depends on a convoluted system of judges that, given the chance, would corrupt a dog show.Oh, yeah, and swimming and running is boring as all hell.You can't seriously tell me that you care about Michael Phelps and the 300 meter butterfly.Clearly Bob Costas has brainwashed you.Equally brutal to the senses are volleyball,tennis,hurdles,high rings,soccer,and equestrian events (which are shown on Lifetime).There is a reason they have this dismal affair every 4 years and it isn't that it's difficult to plan.The real reason is that it takes the other three years to build up the willpower to invest any length of time in watching the Hamm brothers spin around a sawhorse. It has been brought to my attention that every host nation gets to introduce one exhibition event that displays the culture of sports in that particular country.I assume this means there will be a triathalon where the participants carry a sewing machine through a sh*t encrusted rice paddy and then sew themselves a pair of shoes concluding with a 10K walk down streets lined with giant pictures of Chairman Mao and Yao Ming.Winner gets a Houston Rockets jersey.Sweet!! Mon, 11 Aug 2008 23:16:14 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/304215 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/304215 Favre's first workout with the NY Jets was not as sweet as the dying legend would have liked. The latest nonsense from the job-stealing crybaby came in an interview after practicing with his new team.Favre indicated that "the Jets offense is very difficult" and that added that he felt he may not be ready to lead the offense on Saturday despite Jets coach, Eric Mangini, insisting Favre will start the second preseason game. Included among the "I can't learn an offense in a week" complaints was this telling gem : "After practice today, I felt like maybe I made a mistake". What an a**hole. Sun, 10 Aug 2008 21:22:28 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/303825 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/303825 Phillies suck royally behind Hamels scoring NO runs.BONUS DISGRACE!!!!!!!!!! - we trade a A prospect with a winning record and a 2.22ERA for a bag of crap from the CUBS.Some a**hole named Eyre (possibly Jane Eyre,going on the boredom factor here) who has posted a losing (miserably) record and a whopping 7.50ERA. Awesome! Someone new to boo!! Jimmy Rollins is batting about 2.65 now as our leadoff hitter. Great!!! This team sucks. A good team would be running away with this division but instead we remain a the best pile of s*it on top of a bigger pile of sh*t that represents the NL East.Fu*k..........................aarrrgggghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thu, 07 Aug 2008 15:35:00 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/302639 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/302639 In unspecific chronological order: 1. Favre wins superbowl with Reggie White-led defense. 2.Favre spends next decade throwing interceptions at key moments. 3.Favre has good season despite lousy team. 4.Favre displays aerial innaccuracy in playoff loss. 5.Favre retires in early spring and cries a lot on ESPN.Aaron Rodgers puts clipboard down and picks up a football. 6.Favre hints that he might want to play again thereby securing his own category on ESPN's news crawl for the duration of summer. 7.Favre enters secret talks with Vikings,Jets,Bucs, and Green Bay. 8.Green Bay insists they don't want Favre back. 9.Green Bay insists they want Favre as a backup. 10.Jeff Garcia issues statement that Favre will not steal his job. 11.Favre tries to show up to training camp. 12.Aaron Rodgers starts having nightmares. 13.Favre insists he never spoke with Minnesota or NY. 14.NFL considers fining Minnesota for tampering by talking with Favre. 15.Favre applies for reinstatement. 16.NFL reinstates Favre. 17.Packers insist Favre can compete for starting job. 18.Favre insists he doesn't want to play anywhere else. 19.Packers fans boo Aaron Rodgers at camp. 20.Favre drives around Wisconsin with his wife. 21.Favre insists he has given up because he doesn't want to be a distraction. 22.Favre is reported to be traded to Tampa Bay. 23.Jeff Garcia insists he wont give up the starting job. 24.Favre is traded to the NY Jets. 25.Chad Pennington is reported to be released to make cap room for Favre. One consolation is that the Jets will in no way further the "legacy" of Brett Favre.It pleases me to know that Favre will spend his remaining time on a lousy team with obnoxious fans.They were meant for each other.I hope they continue to suck and Favre retires again after one season leaving the Jets confused and wondering why they fired their long time starting QB for a media circus.The story of Brett Favre will end with a mediocre season with the NY Jets but not soon enough to prevent him from taking a dump on the careers of Aaron Rodgers,Chad Pennington and Jeff Garcia. Thu, 07 Aug 2008 13:21:58 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/302559 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/302559 China sucks!!!! Wed, 06 Aug 2008 14:45:38 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/301998 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/301998 Need more proof that Penn State sucks and Joe Paterno hasn't actually coached football in ten years? Philadelphia Daily News reported today that since 2002 there have been 46 different players charged with 153 separate criminal counts. A local police Sgt. characterized the latest round of Paterno-era expulsions as "putting a band-aid on a gun shot wound". Paterno is decrepit,dillusional,and might as well be a cardboard cutout for as much actual coaching he does on-field and off. Frankly, he is exactly what the pregnant alcoholics of Crappy Valley deserve.I hope he lives another 200 years and continues to doom State Pen.We hate.....................................Penn State. Enjoy all the underage drinking deaths,fires,Arts Fest riots, etc. Love the vomit vaccuum,though.Anyone who has had the misfortune to walk down Beaver Ave. after a homegame knows what I'm talking about. Thu, 31 Jul 2008 13:38:37 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/298774 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/298774 Is anyone else annoyed with the new "block" feature? An example: someone, oh....let's just call them Orions, posted a rant decrying Eagle fans for "vicious" attacks on other fans. The idea was to rally other fans against us in some sort of convoluted "crusade" against Philadelphia fandom. Fine.Whatever. The problem I have with that article is that the poster then went on to block anyone perceived as a Philly fan from commenting on his articles. The result is that I can no longer respond to anything written by Orions. At first this seemed really inconsequential but then I ran into a problem. Someone I enjoy talking to on here that hadn't been around for a while posted a comment and I was unable to join back in on the discussion. Frankly, I find the actions taking by Orions to be cowardly and anyone employing this "bait and switch" tactic to prevent others from freely expressing their opinions should be immediately removed from this site. I did not want to post an article that specifically deals with one person or article, and yes I'm aware I've criticized others for doing just that, however I was unable to handle it personally with Orions as the "block" feature also shuts down your e-mail. Last, a word of caution to all Eagles fans. I expect this trend to continue. Be careful when responding to any articles that have an anti-philly bias. More than likely the person is trying to round us up and block us out. And for all you nice,civil,polite Eagles fans take note; I did not use any expletives or personal attacks on the aforementioned article.In fact I was in agreement with Orions on a few points.Yet I,too, was labeled and blocked. Beware, friends! Tue, 29 Jul 2008 13:05:27 -0500 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/297526 http://www.yardbarker.com/author/article/297526