LATEST STORIES FROM BLOG OF HILARITY
Cats Eating Turkey is a WTF Thanksgiving video
1 day ago by
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I was slumming around YouTube just now, looking for something Thanksgiving-y and absurd to post. My first choice was looking for someone with a furry fetish in a turkey costume, but I couldn’t find that. So instead, you get this utterly bizarre video of a guy feeding his cats...
Quote of the Day
1 day ago by
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There are always a lot of articles about how parents need to keep an eye on their kids who have a cell phone since kids are terrible these days and basically $5 away from becoming prostitutes. But this list of text message jargon in a “parents beware!” article made me...
Dog works at Florida gas station. Seriously.
2 days ago by
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I love animals. I have pets, I enjoy scratching dogs under the chin and saying things like, “Who’s a big man” to them. But one place I don’t want to see a dog? Working at the convenience store in a Florida gas station, like this furry gentleman.More pics at...
Men should not be getting breast implants
2 days ago by
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Please let this video be a public service announcement; just because you CAN GET plastic surgery does not mean it’s a good idea. For an example, look no further than this Brazilian gentleman who has given himself breast, shoulder, and trapezius implants then decided to upload...
Quote of the Day
2 days ago by
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With Thanksgiving in mere days, what will you make for your sissy, iron-deficient vegan family members? Not Tofurkey if you know what’s good for you. Even vegans think that food is about as yummy as dog scrotum, according to this Quote of the Day.Going vegetarian on Thanksgiving...
The Twilight magazine article that best reflects the movie
2 days ago by
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Twilight: New Moon had the third biggest opening weekend ever, further signaling America’s losses in its war against obese teenage girls (We won The Battle of Myspace, but find ourselves in even more dire straits). But since it’s clearly a major story, we should cover it...
Alaskan couple lures out neighbors to have sex in front of them
3 days ago by
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The whole Sarah Palin thing revealed an ugly side of Alaska that put them somewhere between inbred and the previous eskimo stereotype. Well, just to cement that perception, I bring you the story of a couple in Juneau who broke the window of their neighbors, then had sex in front of...
Boobs vs little kid ends in a knockout
3 days ago by
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Kids can injure themselves on anything, whether it’s a garbage can or some small plastic toy or the pit of spikes I keep in my yard (the sign clearly says, “Do not fall onto these spikes.” Stupid kids). For further proof of this phenomenon check out this video of...
Quote of the Day
3 days ago by
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Whether you’re for or against the US’s presence in various wars, I think there are few people who take that out on the troops who sacrifice time and their lives for their country. Unless you work at this Brooklyn McDonald’s, where employees beat down a disabled Iraqi...
SNL’s Digital Short “Two World Collide ft. Reba McEntire” is awesome
3 days ago by
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Here at Guyism, we’re usually bigger on bringing you things that you can’t see anywhere else. But sometimes, you need to just tip your cap to something so brilliantly hilarious that it can’t be topped. Take a look at this Digital Short from this weekend’s SNL...
Three sex starved women kidnap and forcibly sex some guy
4 days ago by
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Apparently Zimbabwe is wear you want to be if you’re looking for women in need of sex and don’t mind them forcing themselves upon you in a church. Seems like you’d probably be better off on Craigslist, but who am I to judge if you want to end up like this 18 year-old guy [...]
7 surefire ways to ruin this year’s Thanksgiving
4 days ago by
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Thanksgiving offers families a wonderful opportunity to come together and celebrate a good year over a great meal — or so the movies claim. But if you’re sitting in your childhood bedroom, surrounded by honorable mention trophies you forbid your parent to throw out, and...
This bus sign probably shouldn’t be necessary
6 days ago by
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There are a lot of fairly obvious signs out there since a significant portion of society is borderline retarded. But this sign found on a bus seems a bit common sense. Some things should be able to be left unspoken.Well, if you’re going to say that gang rape isn’t allowed...
Quote of the Day
6 days ago by
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When you’re robbing a donut shop, it’s important to be creative to make sure that no one catches you. I don’t know why that’d be true, but I like the way these criminals think: They robbed an Indiana Dunkin Donuts and made the workers there take off their pants...
Miss Gay Brazil gets her wig ripped off by a bitter competitor
6 days ago by
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People regularly stop me on the street and go, “Chris, we love Guyism. But I have to ask, when are you going to cover the Miss Gay Brazil pageant?” And I have to tell them that I just don’t know, we’re so busy with all the hot chick stuff and Utah senator double [...]
Peruvian gang killed people for their fat
7 days ago by
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Don’t get this headline confused; this is not a case of a Peruvian gang killing people because they hated obesity but rather because they wanted to take the fat people, harvest them, and then sell their fat on the black market. So…at least they’re thinking outside...
Cleveland TV station has bad closed-captioning on the weather
7 days ago by
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If there’s one thing I learned at a young age, it’s that people with disabilities are just as capable of success as you or I am (unless there aren’t ramps by the entrance to a building). But many people with disabilities persevere and achieve great things. Unfortunately...
The 5 dumbest criminals who were foiled by Facebook
7 days ago by
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Do you ever wish you didn’t waste so much time on Facebook? Then congratulations, idiot, you lost a battle of wills with a page of text. Your only hope is that other people are even more tragic, and they are! At least when you waste years of your life without moving around [...]
Little girl’s stuffed animal show does not end well
7 days ago by
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Kids are always putting on shows, be it dancing around or dressing up in silly outfits or getting married and having a baby. But sometimes their shows end in hilarious failure, like this little girl and her “stuffed animal dog show.”Sadly, I can actually relate to this...
Quote of the Day
7 days ago by
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Math can be difficult for children to understand, that’s why teachers often attempt to tie in relatable concepts like “Billy has 7 apples and he lights 2 apples on fire for some reason. How many apples would Billy have if he weren’t retarded?” But how else...
Pregnant 11 year-old gives birth on her wedding day
8 days ago by
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Women often dream of having the perfect wedding day. Flowers, a beautiful place, and popping out a child before you’re in middle school, like this 11 year-old Bulgarian girl who gave birth during her wedding day.Kordeza Zhelyazkova became pregnant two weeks before her 11th birthday...
Utah senator doesn’t want gays “stuffing it down his throat”
8 days ago by
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In something of a positive step for the gay person in Utah, Utah senator Chris Buttars has said he might support a bill giving gay people equal rights for jobs and non-marriage related things. His word phrasing of not wanting gays “stuffing it down [his] throat all the time...
Scrubbing Bubbles thinks your kids should drink toilet water
8 days ago by
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Like many Americans, I use Scrubbing Bubbles to clean my toilet. And by “I use,” I mean “cheer for my girlfriend while she uses Scrubbing Bubbles to clean our toilet.” Being supportive is key to a long-lasting relationship in which you don’t help out around...
Quote of the Day
8 days ago by
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An Indian woman is divorcing her husband for one of the dumbest reasons ever. Of all the misogynist things that go on in India (some women aren’t allowed to wear jeans. JEANS!), this is one woman’s breaking point? The reason behind the divorce is your Quote of the Day...
Mass: We Pray cannot be a real video game
9 days ago by
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Going to church is a lot of fun. You get to sit and stand up and kneel and then sit and stand up some more. Also there’s chanting and you get to get drunk off of someone’s blood, without a whole lot of unnecessary clean-up or stabbing of a hobo outside a Trader [...]
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