LATEST STORIES FROM DEADSPIN
Some Sports Test For Steroids; Others Only Care If You're Dealing
As you ponder the musclebound freaks on your TV, take a minute to realize football has one of the best drug testing policies in sports. Is this to the credit of the NFL, or more indicative of everyone else's nonchalance? The Wall Street Journal broke down the testing procedures...
Your Early Games Open Thread
Here it is, empirical proof that FOX thinks your desire to watch Brett Favre be Brett Favre trumps your desire to avoid Lions games at all cost. Also, enjoy that all-Florida crapfest, West Virginia. [The506]
Massachusetts Has Exactly 1500 Celtics Fans
The Celtics license plate finally hit the magic number of orders to be produced. All it took was three years and a title to find the 1500 people necessary. The Massachusetts DMV (or "RMV," for some reason) produces all kinds of specialty plates, at 40 bucks a pop, with $28...
All You Need To Know About Last Night's Fight
From the AP story: "Cotto's wife and child, who were at ringside, left after the ninth round, unable to watch the beating any longer." Cue Pretty Boy Floyd dodging a fight in 3, 2, 1... [AP]
Who Says There's Nothing To Do In Oklahoma City?
You're young, rich, one of the most talented players on the planet. If you're Kevin Durant, how do you spend your days off? Getting into slapfights, and filming them. Because I've had my fill of hate mail recently, and because OKC fans have already made their feelings...
To Be Fair, I'd Like To See How Your Team Does Without A Quarterback
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap. As Mr. Against Speed showed yesterday, God loves even the Redskins, even though they cost him a three-team parlay by failing to cover against the Chiefs &mdash...
Poon For Everybody!
Missouri fans who made the trip to Manhattan, Kansas to watch their Tigers trash Kansas State 38-12 decided to honor the team's victory by holding up letters to spell out "POON." Although I'm a bit confused by the extraneous "O." Well folks, that does it...
Stephon Marbury Continues To Turn Craziness Into An Art Form
I'm no genius, but it seems to me that Marbury isn't a huge fan of Knicks coach Mike D'Antoni. In a tweet one would suspect was the rantings of a clinically insane individual, Marbury calls the coach "DPHONY." Nice. [SimonOnSports]
Timberwolves GM Wants Fans To Know He Is Aware Of How Much Team Sucks
Mired in a nine-game slide, the Timberwolves are struggling to get acclimated to Kurt Rambis' triangle offense. Further, the team stinks. So, GM David Kahn did the only sensible thing - he wrote a letter to the team's 10 fans. Kahn provided the letter to the Timberwolves blog...
This Guy Is Trying To Steal John Daly's Bit
And no, I'm not referring to Udorn Duangdecha getting his stomach stapled and surviving solely on Diet Coke and cigarettes - check out those slacks. Crap, they're so loud that Marlee Matlin heard him trying them on. [Devil Ball Golf]
Your Late Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
It's time for the second round of games on this wonderful Saturday afternoon. There's plenty of options on the telly, with Florida at South Carolina as perhaps the most intriguing. Can you imagine how excited these girls are right now?
Joe Torre Is Happy For The Yankees - No, Really
Given his acrimonious exit as Yankees manager, one would suspect that Joe Torre would be a bit bitter about the Yankees winning the World Series. Nope. Not at all. In fact, he's as pleased as punch - or something. Torre, who described watching the Yankees in Fall Classic as "...
I Bet The Graphics Guy Who Cropped Indiana's Logo This Way Feels Like A Boob
Heh. Tit. And for those of you worried about this warping our young people, it has already been changed to a less-offensive image. Now, if you'll excuse me, I going to make "BOOBLESS" appear on my calculator. (Thanks, reader Josh)
CFL Player Gets Stabbed After Attending KISS Concert (Updated)
Calgary Stampeders tight end Teyo Johnson got stabbed at a party Thursday night after he went to a KISS concert. Apparently, it has been learned that it was a DJ Tiesto concert - not KISS. Same difference, right? [TSN]
CFL Player Gets Stabbed After Attending KISS Concert
Calgary Stampeders tight end Teyo Johnson got stabbed at a party Thursday night after he went to a KISS concert. I guess you could say he got what he deserved - you know, for going to a KISS concert. [TSN]
It's Too Bad The Title 'Psycho' Was Already Taken
So, Ron Artest is making a movie about his life. That's...um, interesting. In an interview with FanHouse on Friday, Artest announced he is making a straight-to-DVD movie entitled Therapy, which I assume chronicles his rise from poor kid growing up in the projects of Queens to batshit...
To Be Fair, Jesus Was Fiercely Anti-Merkin
Okay, one more Jesus-related post today. In anticipation of College Gameday's appearance in Fort Worth today for the TCU-Utah tilt, one clever TCU fan decided to make it known Lee Corso's long-running feud with the King of Kings. [myFOXdfw]
Your Early Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
You got Tennessee-Ole Miss on CBS. Go forth and watch collegiate football. Drink beer if you wish. Try to avoid getting arrested.
Chad Ochocinco Fined Veinte Mil Dólares By Liga Nacional de Fútbol Americano
¡Ay, caramba! Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver/prop comic Chad Ochocinco has been fined $20,000 by the NFL for jokingly attempting to bribe an official with a dollar bill during last Sunday's game against the Baltimore Ravens. In a letter to Ochocinco, Ray Anderson, the No Fun...
Rick Nash Is A Fancy Boy
I haven't seen a hockey player make a move that fabulous since D.B. Sweeney's one-footed salchow in The Cutting Edge. Columbus Blue Jackets forward (and NHL2K9 coverboy) Rick Nash went with an unorthodox move in last night's 3-2 shootout victory over the Anaheim Mighty...
That's Nice And All, But I Heard Jesus Hates Them
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap. While it may be true that God still loves the Redskins, the big J-Man (I call Jesus "J-Man" - he's cool about it) took Clinton Portis in the first...
And Now A Selection From Tim McCarver's "Great American Songbook" Remixed
During the MLB playoffs, Fox baseball analyst extraordinaire Tim McCarver released a CD of him crooning through jaunty Cole Porter-style songs without a smidge of irony. We had grand plans for this. Some fell through, but one miraculously worked out. The first idea we had was to recruit...
Hockey Player's Attempted Murder Conviction Just A Hilarious Case Of Mistaken Identity
Sportsnet.ca has an epic interview with fresh-out-of-prison former Blues player Mike Danton, who says he didn't hire an assassin to kill his former coach/mentor, David Frost. He was really trying to kill his father. Totally different situation! [Sportsnet, via RiverfrontTimes]
The Louts Will Rise Again
newVideoPlayer("/ole_miss.flv", 500, 375,""); This swaying stereotype called Michael, apparently an Ole Miss frat creature, has some thoughts on that controversial "South will rise again" chant. It takes him precisely 10 seconds to say the magic phrase...
Night Of The Living Customized Jerseys
They're back. As long as people continue to waste money on customized sports clothing we will continue to celebrate whatever it is they're trying to accomplish. It's not a choice ... it's a lifestyle. In this edition, a tribute to Koko the Monkey, more bad duct tape...
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