LATEST STORIES FROM TIM'S TAKE

We're Moving

The Take is no more. For most of you this is not news, considering the fact that the blog has been locked up for the last month or so, and even when it wasn't locked I was writing in it about as often as Zach Galifinakis shaves.While I will be saying goodbye to Tim's Take,...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/06...
 

Ever Wonder What it Takes to be a Strip Club DJ?

Being out of work can be depressing. I can go for days without smiling.One of the few things that actually cheers me up is searching for a job, not because I'm finding an endless supply of new opportunities though. Browsing jobs for Craigslist can put a smile on my face because...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/03...
 

Today I will Brag About Not Having a Job

How's work going?How's pretending to be busy while you are watching the game on CBSSports.com going? Did you get caught yet?Did that kid who really doesn't know anything about basketball keep coming over to you and showing you his "upset bracket" for the office...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/03...
 

Michael Wilbon's List of the Worst Things to Happen to the USA Might be Different than Yours

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Let's do something you probably haven't done since you scored 1300 on your SATs*. Let's do a fill-in the blank exercise.BLANK is one the worst things to happen to the United States of America.We'll accept any of the following answers:--Slavery--Civil War--Great Depression...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/03...
 

Jimmy Fallon Presents "The Bryan Brinkman Project"

If you're on Twitter, follow Bryan Brinkman. Follow him not because I said so, you wouldn't do that anyways. Let's face it, I'm not influential like that.People like Jimmy Fallon and Questlove though, two guys who are influential, are the ones who want you to follow...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/03...
 

MTV Has Good Timing

While some of us were waking up at 6 am, in hopes of speaking with someone at the unemployment office, Kim Kardashian was giving out MTV Cribs Awards.In these tough times, with more and more people losing their cribs; MTV decided to give out awards like: "Coolest Cribs Closet...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/03...
 

I Took February Off

As you can see I am back to writing in "the Take." The last time I was here it was late January.I wasn't being lazy, I was just a little preoccupied with other stuff.Here's a breakdown of that stuff that kept me from writing on this here blog.Some things I did:Talked...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/03...
 

You are Too Ghetto For Hawaiian Tropics Zone

If you opened your copy of the New York Post today, you'd find the heart-wrenching 354 word story of Melody Morales (seen here posing in front of her DVD collection which includes In the Mix, dressed in a bikini that shows off her Puerto Rican patriotism among other things).In...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Saturday Night I Found Out that Dreams do Come True

"You might say that I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one." - John LennonThat guy was right...about a lot of things, especially picking a wife. We are all dreamers, I'm not the only one who dreams. You dream, your mom dreams (about me), your drunk uncle dreams...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

The More She Drinks the Better You Look

Spotted this incredible local ad on the Best Week Ever blog.var addthis_pub="timh1020";
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Cat Vs. Fake Cat

I hate cats. Mostly because I am allergic but also because they aren't very smart. Here's an example of just how dumb they are.I definitely would have embedded this video but MySpace video kind of blows and I can't figure out their embed code.
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

The Top 10 Products/Services that Just won't Go Away

In these harsh economic times, it seems as though companies are folding up like steel chairs at a wrestling match. A lot of those companies that are no longer with us seemed to have some potential. Then there are those products/services that have proven to be recession-proof, finding...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Girl I'd GIve Up Red Meat For : Gizele Mendez

My guess is that you've never seen this young lady before because her body of work is limited to Skinamax flicks, at least that's what imdb tells me.I just so happened to stumble upon a show called "Sex Chronicles: Lust in the Bus Depot," which was on Cinemax at 11...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Facebook or Craigslist? Answers

Since I had some left over photos from last week's post about the ladies of Craigslist's "Erotic Services," I decided to share a few with you. I didn't just want to just throw up some photos of females who will service you in exchange for 200 hugs, that would...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Congratulations Rickey Henderson

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No surprise, Rickey Henderson is a first ballot Hall of Famer. What would be surprising, however, would be Rickey using the words "I" or "me" in his acceptance speech this summer. Rickey only refers to himself as "Rickey."Recently, FanIQ gathered up the...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Burning Questions

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It's Monday. For a while Mondays around here meant Burning Questions. Then I got lazy and Mondays were just Mondays, the worst day of the entire week. Now that I've got some time on my hands, I'm going to give it a shot. I might be a little rusty so if these suck, sorry...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Facebook or Craigslist?

Since I had some left over photos from last week's post about the ladies of Craigslist's "Erotic Services," I decided to share a few with you. I didn't just want to just throw up some photos of females who will service you in exchange for 200 hugs, that would...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Those Are Some Golden Globes

Look at that pair of...New Balances on the grip in the background. What are those? 574s?Sorry if the Take is overdoing with Salma. This is just how we do what we do sometimes, deal with it Cate Blanchett.
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

You're Gonna Love My Nuts

Sham Wow guy can sell more than really incredible shammies. Watch him sell the hell out of the Slap Chop, which I am pretty sure has already been on the market for about 20 years. Look at the numbers Slap Chop is going to do now that Sham Wow guy is on the job.
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Thank You 30 Rock

Tina Fey must have known that we were long overdue for a Salma Hayek sighting. That's why she threw her in last night's episode of 30 Rock, playing Jack's mother's nurse. Kudos to whoever who threw Salma into that red dress as well.
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

This Week in Your Mom

"This Week in Your Mom" is a new segment I just came up with where I search long and hard (the same way your mother likes it) to find the best headline of the week regarding your mother. Actually not your mother, just someone's mother.This week we go to San Diego where...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Real World Brooklyn Live Blog

Coming at you live on the West Coast with an East Coast feed. Gotta love Dish Network. I'm blogging about my favorite reality show, The Real World.I know nothing about this season other than it's in Brooklyn. So here we go.Keep hitting refresh. I'll be updating pretty quickly...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

How Friendly Are You with Your Facebook Friends?

Currently I have 288 friends on Facebook. I pretty much know or virtually know almost all 288. There might be a friend or five who I really have no idea who they are but are Facebook friends with them nonetheless. The rest of them though, I can safely say that I am at least somewhat...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

Vegas Baby! Vegas!: Beer Pong and Parking Lots

This past weekend I went to Vegas and got lost in the Flamingo parking lot. While other parking lots on the strip and pretty much anywhere in the entire world use signs with a letter/number/cartoon character to help you remember where you parked, the Flamingo said "the hell with...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 

10 Things Craigslist's "Erotic Services" Taught Me About Prostitutes

The surprisingly short Wikipedia page for Craig Newmark (the Craig in craigslist) seems very much incomplete. Nowhere in the 107 words (which is 935 words shorter than rapper Craig Mack's Wikipedia page) will you find any mention of two of Newmark's greatest accomplishments...
>> timztake.blogspot.com/2009/01...
 
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