In the words of the ancients, one should make his decisions within the course of seven breaths. It is a matter of being determined and having the spirit to break through to the other side

-Hagakure

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It has come to this Dear Reader(s). With a youthful heart and tempered knowledge of failure, we have braved the tempests, we have scaled the peaks, we have seen the promised land, we are eating the Manna. Humble Sensei, we owe you great thanks for our joy. Without such humility and dedication an honor, without the mentorship, the stewardship, the honed beastliness we have been awed by, this would be merely a dalliance with glory. We know better. We have sweat every second with you, burned the incense to our own emptiness and let everything but the task at hand fall away. We know the tunnel. We know the light. On the field of War, a Empty Master threw his men down in front of us, and he and his forceful followers fell with mostly silence and sievish defense. Empty ideas of Enlightenment will always fall to the Truth. We are Champions, Dear Reader(s). Our Celtics are born again.

In a game that tested both our will and spirit, Ray Allen, in a beatific 48 minutes of basketball, led our Boston Celtics to the greatest comeback in NBA Finals history. Yes, Dear Reader(s), Our Sensei fell in battle, nearly torn apart by the struggle, but his brothers-in-arms carried the load , willing victory. The Mighty Jesus was there the whole time - maybe it was to remind us exactly how miraculous salvation is. Redemption comes in so many forms.

Friend of the beast lair Mike Rotondi shows that he's the ultimate Celtics season ticket holder. And, you know what, he's prettier than Penny Marshall.

As if last night's league mandated win by the Los Angeles Lakers wasn't enough of a slap in the face for basketball purists. We are now forced to endure even more allegations of league corruption, this time coming from the mouth of the disgraced Tim Donaghy. The ex-official insists that personal relationships have affected the outcomes of games for years, including two playoff series in 2002, ahem allegedly.

Here is the full legal filing by Donaghy's attorney. Some of the highlights include the very apropos:

"If the NBA wanted a team to succeed, league officials would inform referees that opposing players were getting away with violations. Referees then would call fouls on certain players, frequently resulting in victory for the opposing team." For the record, both Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett were in foul trouble by the end of the first half last night.

Ignoring my own advice, I watched game 2 in a bar on California's central coast, sipping bottles of Budweiser (I hear all kinds of folks talking about gas topping $4 a gallon, but I paid $4 a bottle for Bud last night and I'm still miffed). Only three of the eighty or so patrons were Celtics supporters, and only one Celtics fan was drunk enough to be vocal about it. For three and a half quarters, he was the only one speaking in the whole establishment.

If I were associated with the Lakers, I would be very ashamed right now. Thankfully, I'm not. I don't root for teams that wear girlie colors, like purple or powder blue.

I would also be very ashamed if I were a sports writer, especially an ESPN sports analyst, who had picked the Lakers to win this series. Once again, the Crack Staff at perkisabeast.com has shown up the establishment. To review, here are the main points we made in support of a Celtics championship

In keeping with Our Journalistic Ethos never to resist the urge to splurge, we keep track with the foul fragrance that abounds the Beast Lair today. Maybe we forgot how much we hated L.A. Maybe Kobe Bryant has rarely exposed himself as so clearly a fraud.

In yet another attempt to recover from his crustier than Kim Cattrall's clit prediction of a Laker's Win in Six, Bill "Your Digital City Douchehole" Simmons writes one of those "Look I'm Sappy Like Mitch Albom and Clever Like Jerry Seinfeld" columns we'd all grown tired of 4 years ago. No, we won't link to this funk nut's spew, no we won't pretend telling America you didn't pick the Celtic because your powers of prognostication carries real weight. Yep it was your prediction, not the fact that our right tackle was higher than three thirds of Charlestown, that cost the Patriot the Super Bowl.

With all the deserved attention that's shining on Perk and his Nuts over the last few days, much misinformation has been carelessly bandied about. We, the Crack Staff, have been adamant over the years, through the difficult Gerald Green era and beyond, rooting for the Celtics and outing sports reporters with poor basketball I.Q.

BOSTON — Boston forward Kendrick Perkins tells everyone who will listen that he is a beast. He even named his Web site www.perkisabeast.com

We had a sense it was coming, a long time coming. We have not devoted ourselves foolishly. On 8 for 11 shooting last night, Our Sensei had 18 points and a most beastly 16 rebounds. He delivered a victory when loss seemed all around.

The Pistons forget the golden rule, don't bring a knife to a gun fight. Celts roll over lackadaisical Pistons 88-79, this despite Joey Crawford's best effort to seek asylum in the upper peninsula with phantom foul calls.

Well, it looks like the long the NBA has once again used draconian tactics to suck even more fun out of the game because the team did not deploy any fireworks display for the opening. While I don't love all the theatrics, I miss the haze of smoke that hangs over the court for the first quarter, giving it that old time Garden feel. However, David Stern was probably a little bored and needed to do something. After all, it's not like a former employee is trying to tear down the integrity of the entire league. By the way, what if a tenth of what John Lauro alleged is true and personal relationships between referees and coaches affected games? This scandal is not over.

Here is Jay-Z at the draft lottery last night representing the team he is a part-owner for...

And here he is at the Celtics/Cavs game Five sitting next to the Cavs bench....

On the day the feds release this evidence, you give us that officiating crew?!?

The fix was in folks. Only the Truth could Save You

In a game that did not deserve to be as close as it was, Paul Pierce overcame the Cavs hacking defense and a complicate officiating crew, to lead his Celtics to the Eastern Conference Finals in what obviously the highlight of his illustrious Celtics career.