John Wall. Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

John Wall opens up about mental health struggles, recounts 'darkest moment'

Content warning: This piece discusses suicide and suicidal ideation, and some people might find it disturbing.

Former NBA All-Star John Wall has opened up about mental health struggles that nearly led to him taking his life. In a recent interview with former Heat players Udonis Haslem and Mike Miller, Wall recounted two separate occasions when he contemplated suicide.  

"Mental health is serious," Wall told "The OGs Podcast" recently. "So, I had to go get a therapist after that. If it wasn't for my two boys, I would have killed myself. I put a gun to my head twice. And a lot of people that are close to me and my friends at the time… they didn't know."

Wall noted that he reached his "darkest moment" when a video in September 2020 showed him flashing gang signs at a party. The former Kentucky Wildcat had previously made similar hand gestures on the court during games, but those incidents didn't land him in hot water. The 2020 video, however, felt like the tipping point as many began to question his maturity level and seriousness.

"I had a gun to my head twice," Wall said recalling the time he hit rock bottom. "I wanted to commit suicide, and I was like, 'Man, if I take myself away from this earth, I'm failing my kids. Who is going to be there to raise them?' I was like, 'If I take it away from them, that ain't fair to me.' I know I gotta be there for them."

Wall has not suited up for an NBA team since the Clippers traded him to the Wizards in February 2023. The Wizards would subsequently waive him, bringing an end to his 13-year career in the NBA.  

A former No. 1 overall pick, Wall becomes the latest NBA veteran to discuss mental health issues after Kevin Love and DeMar DeRozan broke barriers by letting the world in on their vulnerabilities. Love and DeRozan have been widely praised for speaking out against certain social stigmas and leading the way for others in their battles with depression and anxiety.  

If you or someone you know is suicidal, contact your physician, go to your local ER or call the suicide prevention hotline at 800-273-TALK (8255), or message the Crisis Text Line at 741741. Both programs provide free, confidential support 24/7.

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