Slater Koekkoek, who last played with the Edmonton Oilers last season, shared an update on Linkedin on Wednesday, detailing the “unbearable” anxiety he dealt with as a player.
The 29-year-old hasn’t played this season despite being under contract with the Oilers for the rest of the year.
Not much has been said about Koekkoek’s status since training camp, when GM Ken Holland said Koekkoek was taking time to prioritize her mental health.
On Wednesday, Koekkoek offered more insight as to his status.
“I left the game just over a year ago and thought I would share a little bit of my story throughout the next while in case someone is feeling shame towards their anxiety. You are not alone,” Koekkoek said.
“I left the game because my life inside of it had gotten to a place that was unbearable and unhealthy towards my mental health. I would say I played a majority of my professional games without the ability to eat much, if anything, the night before and the day of games.”
“I would be asked to go for dinner with teammates on the road. Knowing I wouldn’t be able to eat, I would isolate myself and usually walk the streets, settling to discreetly bring takeout to my hotel room so nobody would know if I ate or not. I kept this in as much as I could my entire career. My dad had a nervous tummy growing up, I thought that is all I had.
“But when being continuously scrutinized for my on-ice performance, it caused a downward spiral. A vicious cycle of needing to eat but physically being unable. Be kind to one another because you never know what someone might be going through. And stop commenting on people’s weight…it’s friggen weird.”
The message is important, and it comes at a time when mental health has become a bigger topic in the game. Pittsburgh’s Samuel Poulin recently took time away from the Penguins to focus on his health before just announcing his return earlier Wednesday.
Koekkoek has played 186 NHL games over eight years with Tampa Bay, Chicago and Edmonton. He had four assists in 19 games with the Oilers last season and also had a helper in a two-game stint with the AHL’s Bakersfield Condors.
Best wishes go out to Koekkoek and his family moving forward, no matter what the future has in store.
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