The 25 most vile sports movie villains

In truth, the Charlestown Chiefs, the ostensible heroes of “Slap Shot,” aren’t the best of guys. Even with Paul Newman playing their leader, they are a crude, rude bunch, including the ultimate goons, the Hanson Brothers. However, the Syracuse Bulldogs are even more dastardly. They added a bunch of goons, including the infamous Ogie Ogilthorpe, before the title game, which is a classic villain move.

If you are going to have a sex comedy built around skiing, and that is very much what “Hot Dog: The Movie” is, you need an evil skier for the hero to take down. Enter the Austrian Rudolph “Rudi” Garmisch, as played by John Patrick Reger. Needless to say, he doesn’t win the big race at the end of the movie, but he did his odious best.

Roller derby is totally a sport, as the movie “Whip It” certainly can attest to. The movie is mostly about Elliot Page’s character, Babe Ruthless, finding her place in the world and some female friendships. But along the way she has to do battle with Iron Maven (Juliette Lewis), who was the top dog on the derby circuit until Babe rolled into town.

Is “Back to School” a sports movie? Not entirely. But it does feature a huge diving event at the climax. More than that, it involves a preppy jerk played by William Zabka, the quintessential '80s villain for films such as this. Zabka will be back on the list later, but for now we’re tipping our cap to Chas Osborne, who even has the audacity to go by “Chas.”

Chick isn’t the most notable villain in the world of Disney or Pixar. However, the ostensible villain of “Cars” is a formidable foe, even if he didn’t kill his brother, like Scar did. The difference between Chick, voiced by Michael Keaton, and our protagonist, Lightning McQueen, is that Chick will do anything to win and eventually does. However, in another way, Lightning is the real winner.

Frats were the ultimate source of movie villainy for decades, even in a fairly nuanced film like “Breaking Away.” The film focuses on some working-class kids in Bloomington, Indiana, including one who is an avid cyclist, and they work their way into the Little 500, the local university’s annual bike race. There they face off against the rich kids, who naturally look down on them, looking for a measure of revenge for the little guy.

“Teen Wolf” featured Michael J. Fox as a teenage werewolf who rides on a van, which may have gotten most of your attention. However, being a werewolf also makes him awesome at basketball. His main rival, both on and off the court, is Mick McAllister, the star basketball player for the Dragons, the main rivals of the Teen Wolf’s team, the Beavers. In the end, Scott, aka Teen Wolf, learns that he didn’t need magical powers to win.

No, not the Dallas Cowboys. We’re talking about the All-Star team from the kids movie “Little Giants.” They are only kids, so to call them villains is a little harsh. But their coach, Ed O’Neill, is a real piece of work. Good thing Rick Moranis and Co. put him in his place.

“Shaolin Soccer” is an insane movie that winks at its audience, so it’s not surprising that the villainous soccer team is called, well, Team Evil. These villains aren’t nice, and they aren’t afraid to show it. Of course, Team Shaolin has mastered how to use martial arts to be great at soccer and to work in a world of cartoon physics. Team Evil gets points for branding but doesn't have much in the way of nuance (or personality).

We’re borrowing from reality here because “Miracle” is about the actual events of the 1980 Winter Olympics when the United States beat the Russian team in hockey. We believed in miracles, etc. Obviously in real life, the Russians were considered villainous by many, mostly because they were great at hockey and played for America’s cold war foes. However, that dedication to reality makes it hard to see them as too villainous for a film.

Sacha Baron Cohen playing a broad character? Now we’ve heard everything! “Talladega Nights” isn’t a nuanced movie, and the movie is partially about Ricky Bobby growing as a person. As such, at first he is infuriated by the very presence of the gay, aristocratic French Formula 1 driver who has turned his attention toward NASCAR. Then he learns to accept him, but he still wants to beat him.

Is dodgeball a sport? It certainly is in “Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story.” You know a sports movie is dealing with the typical tropes when the good guy dodgeball team is called the “Average Joe’s.” Their opponent? Globo Gym, led by White Goodman, as played by Ben Stiller. Goodman is even an evil real estate developer! It’s all pretty broad but also pretty fun.

In both versions of “The Longest Yard,” a group of convicts, led by former NFL quarterback Paul Crewe, are coerced into a football game against the prison guards, led by an evil warden. In terms of actual villainy, the prison guards are high on the list. The warden even wants to shoot Crewe after his team wins the game. However, we aren’t just ranking evilness but also which villains are the best. These are good villains but not great.

“Kickboxer” is more plausible than “Bloodsport,” which is why Chong Li isn’t on this list but Tong Po is. Don’t knock Tong Po as a villain though. He’s formidable and vicious, which makes him a tough opponent for Jean-Claude Van Damme in his final fight. When Van Damme takes him down, it’s quite rewarding.

Apollo is Rocky’s opponent in the first two “Rocky” movies. Why is he not quite in the top 10? Well, he’s not all that villainous. He’s a great character, but by the third “Rocky” film he’s helping Rocky and by the fourth one he’s dying in a moment of pathos. That knocks him down the villain rankings, with no disrespect to Carl Weathers.

Here’s a sports movie villain who never takes the field. Rachel Phelps doesn’t play sports. Instead, she inherits the Cleveland Indians in “Major League” and does her best to make them fail so she can move them. Her plan doesn’t work, though, because the ragtag Indians come together to find success in spite of her best efforts.

“Blades of Glory” resorts to going to the well of Stranz and Fairchild, who are siblings. It’s indicative of the somewhat lazy nature of Will Ferrell’s figure skating comedy, but on the other hand, the Van Waldenbergs are fun. That’s mostly because they are played by Will Arnett and Amy Poehler, who are always a joy to watch, even if the now-divorced couple don't exactly do much work together anymore.

Mr. T isn’t a great actor, but he knows how to look mean and intimidating. The words “my prediction: pain” are enough to get Clubber Lang on this list. Plus, he was tough enough to take down Rocky Balboa in a fight, only to lose once Rocky had gotten back the eye of the tiger.

Much of “Caddyshack” hasn’t stood the test of time, but one thing that has is the performance of Ted Knight as Judge Smails. He’s delightfully smarmy as the villainous golfer. Knight oozed smugness and pomposity, which made you yearn to see him taken down.

What’s the best nation in the world in hockey? Well, if “D2: The Mighty Ducks” is to be believed, Iceland is in the mix. Not only is the team incredibly tough, led by the sniper Gunnar Stahl, but it is also coached by Wolf “The Dentist” Stansson, who collected more teeth than goals in the NHL. Iceland kills the U.S. in their first matchup and only barely loses in the gold medal game. Now that’s a tough opponent.

You know what makes a basketball team tough to beat? When the players are aliens who have stolen the talents of some of the world’s best basketball players (and also Muggsy Bogues and Shawn Bradley). That’s who the Monstars are. Not only did they steal talent, but they also are playing a game where, if they win, Michael Jordan will be imprisoned on their home planet. Fortunately they don’t win, which meant Jordan could give up baseball and rejoin the NBA.

Welcome back, William Zabka! Johnny may be the quintessential '80s sports movie villain, save for perhaps the guy at No. 1 on this list. Lawrence, the leader of the evil Cobra Kai, seems to live to try and take down Daniel LaRusso. Zabka oozes arrogance, and then he gets his crane kicked, much to everybody’s delight.

“Big Ern” is rare on this list because he actually wins. Talk about a formidable opponent. Not only that, but he’s played by Bill Murray in “Kingpin” in a delightfully bonkers performance. Murray seems to be having a ton of fun, which makes him a ton of fun to watch.

Adam Sandler films are often hit or miss (mostly miss in recent years), yet “Happy Gilmore” works. Why? A lot of it is because of Christopher McDonald’s performance as Shooter. He was the big dog on the PGA Tour until Happy showed up, and Shooter represents the straight-laced version of golf that Happy rebels against. McGavin is a great golfer, arguably better than Gilmore, but he’s also a smug jerk who plans to buy Happy’s grandma’s house to burn it down out of spite.

Who else could it be but the evil Russian from “Rocky IV"? Drago is a physical marvel. He’s way bigger and stronger than Rocky. He even killed Apollo Creed in the ring...and didn’t flinch. Drago is more intimidating than maybe anybody on this list, and his icy demeanor just makes him all that more villainous. Of course, Rocky beats him and also sort of ends the Cold War, but it took a brutal sports villain for any of it to make sense.