Summer movies with an NFL twist
Can’t wait for football? With enough imagination, there’s no such thing as an offseason. Have a look at these summer blockbusters updated with NFL storylines.
'The Flash'
Actual plot: Barry Allen (aka the Flash) encounters multiple Batmans when he tries to change the past by running really fast.
NFL plot: Eagles wide receiver and three-time national track champion Devon Allen tries to get off the Philadelphia Eagles practice squad by running the 110-meter hurdles in 13.04 seconds at the USATF NYC Grand Prix.
If Allen can make this year’s 53-man roster, he’ll join players Skinny Batman (aka DeVonta Smith), Swole Batman (aka A.J. Brown) and Jason Kelce (aka Fat Batman).
'Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny'
Actual plot: In the fifth and final story of the franchise, famed archaeologist Indiana Jones risks it all to recover a legendary dial that can change the course of history.
NFL plot: Indianapolis looks to change its recent history of subpar quarterbacks by dialing up Florida’s Anthony Richardson with the fourth overall pick in the 2023 NFL Draft.
Colts fans have been jonesing for a quality quarterback since Andrew Luck retired in 2019. For the past four years, the team seemed destined to start a string of washed-up quarterbacks that included Philip Rivers, Matt Ryan and Carson Wentz.
At the very least, the 2023 season promises to be an adventure for Indy. With just one year as the Gators’ starting quarterback, Richardson was a risky pick. But if he has a good training camp, Gardner Minshew’s hopes of starting could be doomed.
'Oppenheimer'
Actual plot: A slender man is recruited to build a bomb in a few short years.
NFL plot: Kliff Kingsbury
'Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning'
Actual plot: An IMF agent and his team save the world. Also, Tom Cruise drives his motorcycle off a cliff.
NFL plot: The impossible happens when Joshua Harris and his team of investors save the Washington franchise and agree to buy the Commanders from Dan Snyder. After reckoning with 14 losing seasons in 24 years, Commanders fans offer to drive Snyder to wherever he keeps his private jet.
'Fast X'
Actual plot: In movie No. 10, Dominic Toretto looks to protect his family by driving really fast and beating up 57 bad guys.
NFL plot: In his seventh NFL season, Tyreek Hill joins the Dolphins family where he runs really fast for over 1,700 yards receiving and seven touchdowns. After the season, No. 10 (allegedly) beats up a 57-year-old marina worker.
'Strays'
Actual plot: After being abandoned by his obnoxious owner, a naive dog named Reggie falls in with a group of strays.
NFL plot: After being released by Jerry Jones, a naive running back named Ezekiel Elliott produces a list of teams he’d consider playing for. After months without a bite, Elliott joins a group of unsigned free agents that include fellow running backs Dalvin Cook, Leonard Fournette and Kareem Hunt.
More must-reads: