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FS1's Colin Cowherd Offers Absurd Micah Parsons 'Splash' Take

Originally posted on Athlon Sports | By Adam Schultz | Last updated Jun 28, 2025 8:19 AM ET

First it was Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones will fire Brian Schottenheimer after one season, then it was Dallas would get humiliated every Sunday, and now FS1's Colin Cowherd is at it again.

This time, All-Pro Micah Parsons is in his crosshairs.

And if we are being truthful here, this take is rather laughable.

With Parsons looking at becoming the highest-paid non-quarterback in football, Cowherd made it clear that he wouldn't concern himself with paying No. 11.

"Once again, I like Micah Parsons, but he is a bit of a splash player, and he was in college," Cowherd said. "He'll make highlight plays, he'll beat really bad corners. Boom or bust was great for Jerry Jones in the oil business, it's not great for pass rushers."

Ok, that's enough.

Firstly, "beats bad corners," Mr. Cowherd? Micah plays defensive end. When does he beat corners? We assume you mean tackles, so if you are going to insult Micah, at least do it properly.

Secondly, is Micah a "splash" player?

We have seen all the quarterback pressure and quarterback hurry numbers throughout his career, and the consistent double teams to know that Parsons is anything but a "splash" player.

And in college, Micah was an off-ball linebacker for Penn State, not a sack artist ... so he really didn't "splash'' that way there.

But if that wasn't bad enough, Colin gave his five players he would pay "whatever it takes," and Myles Garrett, Jared Verse, Maxx Crosby, Patrick Surtain II, and Chris Jones make his list.

Garrett, Crosby, Surtain II, and Jones, we can understand given their high level of production, even if Micah has more sacks since 2021 than Maxx. But Verse? After one season, Cowherd would pay him over Micah?

Oh, stop it.

Cowherd did say Parsons disappears in the playoffs, a criticism we get, but that doesn't diminish his overall value. Oh, and Colin also used Parsons' sacks against the New York Giants, Washington Commanders, and Carolina Panthers as a way to not pay him, stating he beats up the "little kids."

What about the Philadelphia Eagles, Colin?

In seven games, Micah has 5.0 sacks, eight quarterback hits, and six tackles for loss.

That's passable, right?

Seen as one of the best pass-rushers in football since he stepped onto the NFL field back in 2021, Micah is absolutely an edge rusher you pay.

So the Cowboys are about to get "humiliated'' weekly.

And they should fire Schottenheimer.

And they shouldn't pay Micah.

Stop it, Mr. Cowherd, you're looking a bit silly now.

This article first appeared on Athlon Sports and was syndicated with permission.

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