Movies from the late 20th century that got pointless remakes

Not every live-action Disney remake has been wholly gratuitous. Take “The Lion King,” for example. While that photorealistic style of animation looked bad, it was a vision and it was a worthwhile curio. “Aladdin,” though, was pointless. In addition to not having Robin Williams around, the original movie is mostly about people and then a genie who can do all sorts of wild stuff because, you know, he’s animated. A big, blue Will Smith didn’t cut it.

We like Richard Linklater as a director quite a bit, and he loves baseball and hangout movies. The idea of him doing a “Bad News Bears” remake was interesting. However, the movie was toothless. The original is raunchy, vulgar, and iconoclastic. Yes, some of it is problematic, and we’re not saying the remake should have carried that element over. But a soft PG-13 take on “Bad News Bears” literally was missing what made the original stand out.

When you change the title of a movie for the remake, that is often not a good sign. You can’t get away with pretending it isn’t a remake. “The Hustle” did the gender-swap thing, replacing Steve Martin and Michael Caine with Anne Hathaway and Rebel Wilson. Neither had a real take on the characters, and it’s not a surprise that the “Maybe Rebel Wilson can star in movies?” era ended swiftly.

The ‘80s charm of “Footloose” is the whole value in the movie. It’s a bit silly, but it has a fun soundtrack and John Lithgow hams it up, which is what he does best. Even then, the idea of a town where dancing is banned felt almost archaic. By 2011 that was even more the case, and they decided to take everything oh-so-seriously this time. They even cast dancers in the lead roles instead of actors!

John Carpenter’s ethos is famously, “Want to remake my movie? Cut me a check and go nuts. I’ll be smoking weed and playing video games.” The issue with remaking “The Fog” is that Carpenter’s movie is all vibes. It’s all built on Carpenter’s style and his feel for mood. Remaking it with the guy who directed “Blank Check” was never going to work out.

We’re annoyed, in part, because they clearly just wanted to draft off of “The Karate Kid” as a franchise. We’re also annoyed because this was a Jaden Smith vehicle from the peak of Will Smith’s cache allowing him to do some wild nepotism. Jackie Chan teaches Jaden kung fu, not karate. Don’t pretend like you’re making “The Karate Kid” then!

After running out of sequel ideas, they figured they might as well remake “A Nightmare on Elm Street.” That’s even though Freddy Krueger had never fallen from the zeitgeist and the original movies were already in the horror canon. There was no Wes Craven or Robert Englund, and they tried to get all serious and “elevated horror” with it. That is different, at least, and thus not wholly pointless. It also just doesn’t work with this franchise and wasn’t sufficient to justify doing this remake. There’s a reason there was no sequel.

Usually, remaking a so-so movie is a fine idea. You aren’t messing with a classic, you know? Some movies, though, are just so thoroughly so-so that it doesn’t make sense. “Overboard” is such a movie. There was no way to juice a remake enough to make it good, especially since the original almost entirely drafts on the chemistry of Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn, an actual couple. The “Overboard” remake did not have that.

Remaking “The Running Man?” That’s a Stephen King remake we get. The original is fun, but goofy, and very ‘80s. It feels immensely dated, and also isn’t terribly faithful to the book. The “Pet Sematery” remake, though, is just more of the same. It’s also far from the most-compelling King premise. The 2019 remake also gave us something more egregious: a gratuitous prequel.

Instead of modernizing this slice of ‘80s goodness, the remake of “Valley Girl” is a period piece. Why would we watch a movie set in the fake ‘80s when we could just watch a movie actually made in the ’80s? Additionally, the original’s best trait is its fantastic soundtrack. The remake is a jukebox musical, so we hear a bunch of worse versions of classic ‘80s songs.

“Total Recall” works because it's Paul Verhoeven madness. The gonzo execution made it a cult classic. You don’t get any of that energy in the remake, a staid film from Len Wiseman. Had they opted to do a serious, elevated take more in line with the Philip K. Dick short story, having that secondary option may have made sense. This is just a generic sci-fi action movie, though.

“The War of the Roses” is a strong black comedy based upon reuniting Michael Douglas, Kathleen Turner, and Danny DeVito for a third movie. There was a built-in chemistry at the heart of this story of a wealthy couple in a vicious divorce battle with one another. The 2025 remake paired Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman, who have no chemistry together. Also, for some reason the Roses are British now?

“Red Dawn” is awash in the Cold War. Doing a “Red Dawn” remake post-Cold War was pretty unnecessary. They tried to get away with making North Korea the villains, but that was only after they chickened out on making the baddies China. Literally, in post-production they changed it from China to North Korea. Knowing that, you surely will be shocked to hear this movie wasn’t very good.

Given that they decided to throw the 2023 remake on Hulu, never a significant home for original movies, probably indicates even the studio didn’t think there was much of a point to this remake. The premise is entirely replicable, but how were you going to do it better? You also couldn’t really do it differently, other than maybe working smartphones and social media into the mix. Plus, they couldn’t do any better for the leads than Sinqua Wells and Jack Harlow. Yes, the musician.

Well, at least “The Witches” mostly got Robert Zemeckis away from his love of the Uncanny Valley, seen in movies like “The Polar Express” and “Welcome to Marwen.” Also, his remake of “Pinocchio.” The original “The Witches” was famously nightmare fuel for an entire generation, but Zemeckis’ sheen-laden aesthetic style was never going to deliver something like that. This movie is a true shrug, and one of Zemeckis’ worst.

“Prom Night” stands in for every horror movie remade in a glossier, duller fashion. The original is a cult slasher classic starring Jamie Lee Curtis. It’s not great by any means, but “Prom Night” delivers what horror hounds want. However, it’s also not a big enough movie to have generated buzz for a remake, and they also opted to make the remake PG-13, which is death to any slasher remake.