Celtic’s cunning Plan B – Sign goal-shy striker on loan, save £10m – genius

The Dane, fresh from banging in 24 goals last season for Anderlecht, suddenly looks like he might fancy a romantic return to Amsterdam rather than a cold Wednesday night in Aberdeen. No accounting for taste and all that.

But fear not! Because according to journalist Mark Hendry’s Substack, we may have a cunning Plan B (or is it Plan L by now?) – a loan move for Strasbourg striker Sekou Mara.

The 23-year-old hasn’t kicked a ball for the French side this season, which is always a reassuring sign of a prolific marksman in the making.

That said, Strasbourg paid over £10 million for him back in 2024. But so far, he’s contributed next to nothing for them. Before that, he was at Southampton. And last season in Ligue 1, he played 27 games and chipped in with three whole goals. Three. Goals.

At least try to contain your excitement.

Mara’s story actually started with more promise at Bordeaux, where he became the youngest player to score a league goal for them in almost 14 years. Burgeoning financial woes – well that’s what we call liquidation in Scotland isn’t it? – meant Bordeaux cashed in, shipping him to the Premier League, but he never established himself. Since then, the lad’s been drifting as much as the career of any former Ibrox manager.

Could Celtic be where he rediscovers his mojo? Maybe it could. Stranger things have happened. But, when you’re staring down the barrel of Ajax nicking Dolberg, and the answer is a shot-shy striker who hasn’t found the net regularly in three year -well, you’ve got to laugh or you’ll cry.

Still, it’s a rumour. And as any Celtic supporter knows, fresh rumours are the lifeblood of transfer window. But on deadline day? Now that’s a bit more worrying especially since we have world class operators handling our transfer business.

Who knows? Maybe Sekou Mara will arrive and grab the winner in a Glasgow Derby, and score a barrowload in the Europa League, then we’ll all swear we always rated him. Don’t lie to yourself. You will.

Still, lets stick to the positives for now. Dolberg has yet to sign for Ajax, it is only a rumour at the moment, and Mark Hendry also told us all there was nothing in the Balikwisha to Celtic rumours and he played for us yesterday.

He’s been right plenty times as well of course, but on this one, do we even want him to be?

Keep the faith, keep the faith. There’s still seven hours to go.

Celtic in the Eighties – Out on Friday!

All pre-order copies will be posted out by tomorrow. Celtic in the Eighties is published on Friday 5 September by Celtic Star Books. All orders already received will receive a copy signed by Danny McGrain however the signed copies have now sold out.