20 iconic must-watch movies & TV shows about coming out

Ryan Murphy hit it out of the park with Pose, his drama series focusing on a group of trans and queer folks in New York City of the 1980s and early 1990s. It is particularly notable for its inclusion of many trans women of color and their stories, and coming out, in many senses of the word, is a key element of many of these characters’ story arcs. The series is at times humorous and at times deeply heartbreaking, and it paints a fascinating portrait of a key historical period for the LGBTQ+ community.

The 2024 documentary Will & Harper earned critical praise when released, and it’s easy to see why. Its story is important, focusing as it does on comedian Will Ferrell and his friend, trans writer Harper Steele, and their road trip. It’s one of those films that is many things at once, for it is both a testament to the extraordinary friendship between these two people as well as an ode to the importance and power of trans identity. If the film changes just one mind, then it will have served a noble and necessary purpose.

Unlike many coming-out films, which focus on young people, Beginners instead follows Hal Fields, played by Christopher Plummer, as he comes out as gay while in his 70s. Framed through his son Oliver’s recollections, the film is a touching and poignant look at what coming out can look like in one’s golden years. Among other things, the film is notable for its heartfelt and dazzling performance from Christopher Plummer, who likewise shows that one’s skills on the screen needn’t diminish with age.

Longhorns might be a bit rough around the edges — like many indie queer movies of the 2000s and 2010s — but this is precisely what gives it its charm. The dramatic heart of the story is the relationship between straight Kevin and his eventual dalliance and relationship with Cesar, who is openly gay. It handles the issue of coming to terms with one’s sexuality with a light touch and, amidst all of the ridiculousness and the laughs, there’s a rather poignant story about the value and importance of living a life that is true to oneself.

Few films have handled the conflict between faith and sexuality with as much heart and sensitivity as Latter Days. As its title suggests, it focuses on the relationship between a struggling actor, Christian, and Elder Aaron, a Mormon who starts questioning his sexuality once he meets Christian. Aaron’s journey to self-acceptance is an uneven one, but he finally comes to accept his homosexuality and even manages to forge a relationship with Christian despite their many differences and disagreements. Funny and heartwarming, the film remains an underrated gem from the 2000s.

Love, Victor, the TV spin-off of Love, Simon, focuses on Victor Salazar as a young man coming to terms with his sexuality. The series doesn’t shy away from some of the more difficult aspects of this process, particularly since Victor’s mother has a hard time accepting her son as he is. It’s a wrenching storyline that takes up most of the second season, but it ultimately ends with Isabel accepting and loving her son. It’s a story that resonates with many who have faced a similar struggle, and it is anchored by terrific performances from Michael Cimino and Ana Ortiz.

Love, Simon, based on the novel Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, features Nick Robinson as the title character, a high school student who has only recently come to terms with the fact that he’s gay. As the film goes on, he grapples with the reality of the closet and how this affects his life and relationships with his friends, family, and secret crush. Arguably, the most powerful scene is the one in which his mother greets his coming out with unconditional love and acceptance, a reminder of how important such love is to LGBTQ+, particularly those who are still in their teens.

Shelter is very much a love story, focusing as it does on the unexpected romance that springs up between surfers Zach and Shaun. At the same time, it’s also very much a coming-out story, since Zach doesn’t really think about being attracted to men until his relationship with Shaun takes off. The crux of Zach’s story is his attempt to come to terms with who he is and what kind of life he wants to lead, and fortunately, both men end up forging their future together.

Barry Jenkins’ Moonlight is arguably the director’s finest offering, and the critical praise it received, including an Oscar for Best Picture, testifies to its remarkable emotional power. The three men who play the character of Chiron — Alex Hibbert, Ashton Sanders, and Trevante Rhodes — bring rich and wrenching complexity to a young African American man struggling with his sexuality and yearning for a sense of connection. This is a film that stays with the viewer long past the final moment, and the film is a reminder of the very human need for connection and love.

Transparent more than deserves the praise it has received, given that it focuses on an often-overlooked coming out narrative: that of an older trans woman coming out and living her truth (even if it also faced some criticism for hiring a cisgender man to play a transgender character). The show was notable for its sensitive and heartfelt approach to the subject, even as it also had more than a dose of humor. From beginning to end, it managed to be the perfect blend of comedy and drama, helped along by a remarkably talented cast.

Desert Hearts is one of those rare ‘90s LGBTQ+ movies that doesn’t end in tragedy. The film focuses on the romance that emerges between Vivian and Cay in 1950s Nevada. It’s a poignant and deeply felt portrayal of lesbian love and desire in an era where such things were forbidden and came with a tremendous social cost. Like the best of such films, however, Desert Hearts demonstrates the extent to which some LGBTQ+ people were able to live their truth despite the repressive society that surrounded them.

Based on the novel by André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name follows the youthful love affair of Elio and Oliver, the former a young man living with his family in Italy and the latter a graduate student studying with Elio’s father. As a result of this passionate summer fling, Elio comes to terms with his own sexuality. While the relationship ends when Oliver goes back to the United States and starts dating a woman, it’s clear that this love has forever changed the course of Elio’s life and that he will never be the same.

But I’m a Cheerleader is one of the most deliciously funny LGBTQ+ movies of the 1990s. Natasha Lyonne is particularly hilarious as Megan Bloomfield, a cheerleader whose parents send her to a camp to try to convert her to being straight. Of course, the opposite ends up happening, and Megan ultimately gains the power to claim her identity. This shows that when parents attempt to force their children to fit into their mold, it rarely works out as they intend.

Pariah may not be the easiest coming-out film to watch, but it is arguably one of the most important. Adepero Oduye stars as Alike (“Lee”) who slowly but surely accepts the fact that she is a butch lesbian. Doing so, however, comes with a cost, particularly when it comes to her relationship with her mother, and the film pulls no punches when it comes to depicting the pain of familial rejection. It’s a film of big feelings and intimate ideas, and it shows both the trial and the triumph of being oneself. 

Alex Strangelove is sweet and hilarious at the same time. It focuses on Alex Truelove, played by Daniel Doheny, who struggles to come to terms with his sexuality. As a result, he ends up leaving a great deal of emotional chaos in his wake, one of the victims of which is his best friend (and almost girlfriend), Claire. Fortunately, it all comes out okay in the end, and the film is a vital reminder of why it’s so important to provide young people with the emotional support they need to truly be themselves.

Released in 2014, Date and Switch is one of those comedies that is unabashedly silly but nevertheless has a good message. The story revolves around best friends Michael and Matty, the latter of whom ends up coming out as gay, leading to various hijinks. While the humor can be a bit heavy-handed and while not every joke lands, there’s still a lot to love about this film, particularly since it features a coming-out story that moves beyond the simple feel-good vibes upon which this sub-genre often relies. 

Released in 1998, Edge of Seventeen focuses on Eric Hunter. As the film proceeds, he comes to terms with the fact that he’s gay, thanks in no small part to the presence of his friend and boss, Angie (played by queer cinema stalwart Lea DeLaria). It’s a sweet and tender film, one that explores both the joys and the challenges of coming out in the 1980s in a place like Sandusky, Ohio. 

As its title suggests, the hit Netflix series Sex Education grapples with quite a few issues when it comes to the sex lives of its teenage characters. One of the more notable storylines involves Adam, whose arc involves coming to terms with his bisexuality. During the series, he dates both men and women, and actor Connor Swindells gives a nuanced and heartfelt performance in the role, slowly revealing Adam’s many layers to the audience. It’s easy to see why this show remains so beloved among its many fans.

Created by and starring Benito Skinner, Overcompensating focuses on Benny, a young closeted man who slowly comes to terms with himself and his identity after he goes away to college. In addition, he forges a close relationship with his new best friend Carmen. The show is quite outrageous and campy, but it also has a heart of gold. Just as importantly, it shows just how much of an impact the closet continues to have on young people, particularly those who grow up outside of major cities.

While many members of the LGBTQ+ community have seen an increase in representation in recent years, there are still relatively few depictions of bisexuality in popular culture. This is precisely what makes Heartstopper such a delightful show. One of its two leads, Nick, ends up coming out as bisexual, and the show makes a point of having him correct people when they assume that he’s gay. It’s the kind of show that doesn’t beat the viewer over the head with its message, but it nevertheless marks an important moment in the history of bisexuality on screen.