Found March 15, 2012 on It's Always Sunny in Detroit:

Starting today and probably continuing for the next three weeks, you'll want to punch out some of your officemates. It happens, it's NCAA Tournament time. Everyone is a genius and everyone was re-born yesterday as Nostradamus. Nobody likes violence in the workplace, but it might be worth it for some of these people...

1. The guy who walks into the office and proclaims to anyone in earshot that his bracket is done -- Nobody asked, dude. Unless you had Georgetown or Notre Dame in the Final Four (and if you did, that's your fault), odds are you aren't done. And even if you overpicked teams from the Big Least, let people ask you before you cry from the balcony.

2. The chick who finishes the pool in the top three -- Of course she picked Ohio University because green is her favorite color. Northern Iowa wears purple - much prettier than UNLV's black and red. Washington wears purple - it should have been obvious they would upset Marquette. Oye.

3. The guy who submits five brackets -- When you fill out enough brackets to have nearly every scenario down, you just took the fun out of everything. If you don't see a return on your investment, you're a huge sucker. But, if you do get cash back, I'm not going to give you credit anyway. You're the Yankees of your pool. Fill out two brackets, maximum, anymore than that and I'm rooting against you - hard.

4. The guy who picks his alma mater to go to the Final Four -- no matter what -- when his diploma reads North Texas. -- The guy who runs the pool has already thrown that bracket out for it represents the Pittsburgh Pirates. Newsflash: the Pirates aren't winning the 2010 World Series. Even if said guy is easy money, I'd rather outpick people who know that Robert Morris had no shot against Villanova...right?

5. The guy who walks into the office and explains exactly why he picked (fill-in-the-blank 14 seed) to beat (fill-in-the-blank 3 seed) -- "I knew Armon Bassett and DJ Cooper would get hot from three. With the way Nobody University plays defense, it was obvious that McDonald's All-America U. would turn it over 18 times. I knew Nobody U. would want it more." Ok Digger Phelps. It's one game worth one point. We don't need a babbling1 5 minute recap.


Oh by the way, my bracket is done and I'm going to take my freakin' office pool down, suckas!


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