Originally written on Extra Pine Tar  |  Last updated 11/2/14

LOS ANGELES, CA - JULY 25: (L-R) Luciana Barroso, actor Matt Damon, and his mother Nancy Carlsson-Paige arrive at Universal Pictures' premiere of 'The Bourne Ultimatum' held at the ArcLight Hollywood on July 25, 2007 in Hollywood, California. (Photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images)

Poor Jeremy Renner. This really wasn’t his fault. They should have just let this series be. It had a great run, but three movies was enough. By the time they came out with the third Matt Damon installment, most pe

 

ople were like “Really? Another Bourne movie?.” And it was still really good, but the last thing that would have ever come to my mind would have been “Boy, I really hope they make another Bourne movie.”

When I first heard that Renner was going to be taking over, he had just come out with Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol, which, in itself, I couldn’t believe they had made. But, unlike this movie, I was pleasantly surprised when I went to see Tom Cruise try to prove to everyone, again, that he’s NOT gay.

Renner’s performance was actually good, but this movie never stood a chance. You can’t make a good film when you write a script that is so jumbled it brings a new character aroun

d every 15 minutes with absolutely zero back story. Legacy even finds a way to make Edward Norton look like he’s mailing it in. Despite the numerous close-ups of Norton’s face, it’s tough to feel any sort of emotion from his character – save for the intense nostril flaring.

The best part of the movie was, obviously, the action scenes. And they are really, really good, but outside of that I was very underwhelmedThe film opens in alaska in a scene that doesn’t answer a single question you could possibly have about the main character. All you can really gather is that Alaska is cold as ****, Jeremy Renner has really small nipples and Alaska has no business being a US state.

We learn that Renner is Aaron Cross, another of the bio-engineered super assassins of Treadstone who takes special pills (one blue, one green) to keep up his physical and mental edge. When he loses the pill, he has to get more before his brain and body shut down.

Unbeknownst to Cross, his entire operation is being shut down and the people involved are dropping like flies.  He makes his way to the home of scientist Marta Shearing (Rachel Weisz), who was one of the people involved in his project that also avoided assassination.

Together, hunted all the way, they escape to Manila, to the lab where the pills are manufactured. Once there, Shearing can make Cross’ advancements permanent, but not if Edward Norton, and this guywho looks like Brian Dennehy with a cleft lip, can help it.

And that’s pretty much it. There’s a lot of useless dialogue with cool action scenes mixed in here and there, but mostly it’s just a lot of talking and bad story lines.

You would think with all of the talking, and the 134 minute run time, there would be an ending that made sense. But, much like the rest of the movie, the ending just kind of happens. Be ready to go “Wait, it’s actually over?” and then “Are you telling me that piece of **** was a Bourne movie?”

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

EPT Grade: C -

 

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