Originally written on 22gigantes  |  Last updated 10/31/11

12 Jul 1999: Ted Williams the Boston Red Sox Hall of Famer throws out the first pitch as he stands next to Tony Gwynn of the National League Team is in action during the 1999 MLB All-Star Game against the American League Team at Fenway Park in Boston, Massachusetts. The American League Team defeated the National League Team 4-1. Mandatory Credit: Brian Bahr /Allsport

According to Neumann, a reincarnated Ted Williams will bat .407 during the 2036 regular season.

With the free agent market doors opening over the weekend, it’s still too early to gauge just how well the San Francisco Giants will do in terms of finding another bat or two to support their top-notch starting rotation.

With that being said, it’s difficult to make an assessment today on whether or not the Black and Orange will be able to make a viable run at another title in 2012.

Let alone 2036.

But one prognosticator has already predicted the G-men won’t be returning to the Fall Classic anytime soon. Make that anytime in the next 25 years.

ESPN editor Thomas Neumann (an admitted San Diego Padres fan) broke out his crystal ball Saturday and made a bold prediction…..er, 25 bold predictions in his article titled “Predicting The Next 25 World Series Champs.”

Neumann gets right to it with his pick of the Philadelphia Phillies over the New York Yankees in six games next season. A very reasonable guess.

But as you scroll down the article, you will soon find yourself wondering whether he was using a crystal ball, or crystal meth.

For instance, Neumann predicts that the Chicago Cubs will play in five straight World Series — and lose all five! First of all, that would require the end of the Billy Goat Curse, which has plagued the Cubbies for the past 66 years. Chicago hasn’t won a pennant since 1945. Of course, five straight World Series losses would have people still talking about the curse. Or at least Marv Levy and the Buffalo Bills.

Another interesting prediction Neumann makes is the winner of the 2017 Fall Classic. The team that will beat the Cubs in their fifth straight appearance is none other than the — wait for it — Sacramento A’s.

The Athletics, Neumann predicts, will finally give up on moving to San Jose and move into Raley Field (the current home of their Triple-A affiliate, the Sacramento Rivercats). That might require some retrofitting — and a plan to move to the capital city, something that has been talked about in the past but is not currently a topic of conversation in baseball circles, as far as I know.

He’s then got the A’s winning it all again in 2025 — as the Las Vegas A’s. And in 2030 as the Mexico City A’s. And again in 2034 as the Shanghai A’s. Who the hell owns this team? Al Davis, Jr.?

The A’s aren’t the only team that will change cities either, according to Neumann.

The New Jersey Yankees will lose to the San Diego Padres (led by Tony Gwynn III, of course) in four games come 2035.

The only Giants appearance comes courtesy of the Yomiuri Giants (of the Japanese Baseball League), who will defeat the Arizona Diamondbacks in an international six-game “world” series in 2029.

Yomiuri, along with the Hokkaido Nippon-Ham Fighters (2033 world champs), Hiroshima Toyo Carp (2027) and the two overseas A’s teams obviously gives us a hint that MLB will succeed in it plan to truly make baseball a worldwide sport.

In fact, the sport goes inter-galactic by 2036, when the Andromeda Galaxy Quasars defeat — who else? — the Chicago Cubs, in a tight seven-game series, led by a reincarnated Ted Williams, whose playing on a massively muscular animatronic body modeled after Barry Bonds.

Obviosuly, Neumann’s piece (part of ESPN’s hilarious Page Two series) is more comical than contemplative, so don’t go calling your bookie just yet.

As a matter of fact, Neumann’s funniest prognostication has to be the 2023 World Series championship he predicts for the Los Angeles Angels of Santa Anaheim and South Orange County, Including But Not Limited To Laguna Beach, Dana Point and San Juan Capistrano. Try getting all that on a jersey!

I hope you enjoyed reading "Are the Giants poised for a World Series return? Not according to this guy…." I'm interested in your opinion on this article. Why not leave a comment at 22gigantes.com?

Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

Utah beats Michigan 24-17, ruins Jim Harbaugh’s debut

Patriots keep Tom Brady excitement close to vest

Wayne happy about Brady verdict: 'That's my quarterback'

Markieff Morris on Twitter: ‘My future will not be in Phoenix’

Jonathan Kraft on asking for draft picks: 'Never say never'

Redskins charge non-season ticket holders $50 to use will call


Arthur Blank on Roger Goodell: ‘Change may be appropriate’

Belichick gives typical reply to question about Brady's freedom

Goodell not attending season opener at Gillette Stadium

Jakub Voracek will donate $1,000 for every point he scores

Dwayne Bowe reportedly in danger of being cut by Browns

Slava Voynov taken into custody by U.S Immigration

Tim Tebow shines in Eagles’ final preseason game

Minnesota loses against TCU, but shows it belongs

Minnesota loses against TCU, but shows it belongs

Trevone Boykin’s Heisman bid off to rocky start against Minnesota

Michigan lost their opener, but showed signs of improvement

Aaron Rodgers on Brady ruling: ‘It’s a good day for the players’

Jim Harbaugh uses Seahawks play card and Seattle loves it

First drive of Jim Harbaugh Era in Michigan ends in interception

Redskins fan who named son after RG3: ‘I don’t regret it at all’

Freshmen to watch in Week 1 of college football

Early returns on Manny Machado, MLB shortstop

Judge Berman offered free coffee for life

Conor McGregor insults Jose Aldo, plans move to lightweight

MLB News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

The Gospel Of Harbaugh prepares for its ultimate test of faith

Meet the Utah Utes, the pluckiest program in college football

Iman Shumpert will name daughter Iman Shumpert Jr.

Dallas company celebrates Romo with DirecTV 'crownies'

Top 10 storylines for Week 4 of the NFL preseason

Matt Williams is still hopelessly married to the idea of the closer’s role

Five unique CFB games to watch this weekend

Be careful what you wish for, Jay Gruden

Ryan taking leap of faith with Bills

Top 10 storylines for Week 1 of college football season

Today's Best Stuff
For Publishers
Company Info
Follow Yardbarker