Originally written on Purple Jesus Diaries  |  Last updated 11/18/14


Yeah, I admit it. When Ricky Rubio went down with a torn ACL, I was a little bit nervous. The Timberwolves were making a NICE run towards the playoffs (in comparison to playing like a rotting fish carcass for the past five years), and a lot of it had to do with Rubio's magic-like vision on the court, his Leonidas-esque leadership, and his Bieber-ish charm. Sure, sure ... Rick Adelman had a lot to do with it, and of course Kevin Love is a good basketball player. But really, man, that Spanish Unicorn ... He took **** to the NEXT LEVEL. Well worth the two year wait. And then all those hopes, dreams, and erections went for naught as he lay there writhing in pain, torn ACL and all, with no viable alternative at the point guard position for the team.

But fear not, dudes! This team gets right back up on their horse and goes out and does the smart thing. When you lose a dynamic player like Rubio, you just replace him, and that's what the Wolves have done by signing former Florida International University point guard Nick Taylor to a futures/reserves contract!

Although dimunitive in stature, Taylor is large in heart. Sure, he's just 5'10" and 165 pounds (smaller than some girls I've dated, heyo!), but he plays with HEART. He runs a solid forty yard dash, having been clocked at 4.34 and 4.27, and shows excellent lateral quickness. These are exactly the qualities that the team needs in order to replace a player like Ricky Rubio, and with his recent signing, we shouldn't have any worries about the Timberwolves making a solid push for that eight or seven seed even. Awesome!


Of course, that's what I'd be saying if Nick Taylor was signed by the Timberwolves last week, instead of the Minnesota Vikings. You see, Nick Taylor is a point guard, formerly of basketball and football "powerhouse" Florida International University. You know, that school where all of the famous basketball and football players came from? Michael Jord... Dwayne Wa... Kevin Lov... Peyton Manni... Purple Jes... Tom Brad... Uh, well, after playing BASKETBALL at FIU, Taylor ended up in the Arena League for a while last year, too, which is where all the budding professional football players go to play in order to hone their craft, like Terrel Owe... ..... God dammit.

Taylor is currently listed as a defensive back for the Vikings, if this means anything. It probably doesn't bode well for Marcus Sherels if the Vikings are willing to look at an Imp to replace him. At this point, I'd rather have Peter Dinklage. At least then we'd have some awards in our trophy case, with his Emmy or whatever. My guess is that Spielman just really needed some help in his March Madness pool. Hope it works out for him, so he gets his 20 dollars back! Dick.

[follow]
GET THE YARDBARKER APP:
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Pete Carroll empathizes with Belichick, Pats in Deflategate

Max Scherzer thanks Tigers with full page newspaper ad

Ray Lewis: Patriots should have asterisk for cheating

Report: Cavs players believed team lacked depth

Richard Sherman calls out Kraft, Goodell over their friendship

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Brandon Jennings to miss 6-9 months with Achilles injury

Report: Josh Gordon tests positive for alcohol

Report: Yankees reject A-Rod's request for apology meeting

Jim Harbaugh has landed three recruits in 24 hours

Report: NFL tried to catch Patriots in the act

John Harbaugh: Bill Belichick is best coach of this century

Five potentially fatal flaws for Patriots in the Super Bowl

49 Stops to Super Bowl XLIX

WATCH: Opposing Packers celebrate Pro Bowl TD

WATCH: Sherman, Peterson hug it out at Pro Bowl

WATCH: Chris Berman is not happy at the Pro Bowl

PHOTO: Brock Lesnar's tramp stamp says ‘Kill ‘em All’

WATCH: Hassan Whiteside blocks five shots in 7 minutes

Duke unveils 'K' hats after Coach K's 1,000th victory

Irina Shayk dumped Ronaldo over cheating rumors?

Mike Napoli almost retired because of sleep apnea

WATCH: 'Saturday Night Live' takes on Deflategate

Should Tom Izzo be worried about his Spartans?

NBA News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
the YARDBARKER app
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

Potential fatal flaws for Pats in SB XLIX

49 Stops to Super Bowl XLIX

Chris Berman isn't happy at the Pro Bowl

Brandon Jennings out 6-9 months

Josh Gordon tests positive for alcohol

Report: A-Rod's apology meeting request gets rejected

Harbaugh rapidly landing recruits

WATCH: 'SNL' spoofs Deflategate

NFL tried to catch Pats in act?

Bill Nye: Belichick didn't make sense

Is it time for Tom Izzo to worry?

Jennings suffers horrific injury

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.