Originally written on The Royal Half  |  Last updated 4/2/12

BOSTON - JANUARY 01: Mike Richards #18 of the Philadelphia Flyers smiles before playing against the Boston Bruins during the 2010 Bridgestone Winter Classic at Fenway Park on January 1, 2010 in Boston, Massachusetts. (Photo by Jim McIsaac/Getty Images)

Game #80

LA KINGS
39-27-13
91 pts, 3rd in Western Conference
vs
EDMONTON OILERS
32-38-9
73 pts, 14th in Western Conference

Oilers lead Season Series 2-1

7:30pm, Staples Center
Los Angeles, CA
PRIME TICKET

BEST PLAYER TO WEAR BOTH COLORS THAT IF HE HAD STAYED WITH THE KINGS
THIS SEASON HE WOULD BE THE KINGS 4TH OVERALL SCORER AND TIED FOR 3RD IN GOALS:

 

BEST OPPOSITION BLOGS:
JeanShorts and BaggedMilk
Oilers Nation
Oilers Jambalaya
Lowetide

ARE THE LA KINGS IN THE PLAYOFFS?
YES.

It's another Monday night game for the Los Angeles Kings... and I'm totally unprepared for a Gameday Thread. Thankfully, Brigitte over at One Girl, One Puck has a brand-new edition of her column that is sweeping Kings Nation... "Know Your Opponent." And with this weeks post, we now know that Brigitte is a perfect fit for The Royal Half... because she makes fun of Indiana Matt!!!

Click Here to Check Out "Know Your Opponent" for the Kings vs Oilers Game on Monday, April 2nd!!!

I'm gonna be honest... I don't know a lot about the Oilers. I know that they've been eliminated from the playoffs, which means they suck. I know that they have a ton of young players who are pretty damn good, yet they still manage to be terrible. I also know that Ryan Smyth plays for them because he cried like a ***** this summer. Whatever. Ryan Smyth is old, and is pretty much useless unless he's within 3 feet of the net. Even then he just stands there and lets pucks hit his stupid ******* giant stick blade. Ryan Smyth sucks. You knows who's better than Ryan Smyth? Mike Richards. Even though Richards has been a ghost since coming back from a concussion, I'd still take him over Smyth any day. Why? Because you know who's sexier than Ryan Smyth? Mike Richards. So what, I'm shallow, you should know this by now. That's pretty much all I know about the Oilers. Instead of actually having something witty to say I made terrible photoshops of Mike Richards making Ryan Smyth cry. Eat your heart out Indiana Matt!

 

 "Look at this idiot! He requested a trade TO Edmonton. Haha, what a dumb ****."

  

"You see this chart here shows how many blow jobs I've gotten since I've been in LA."

  

At least this Carter and Richards double team won't leave anyone with herpes. Hopefully.

  

"Hey guys check it out! We didn't even need to shove him he just went in the locker by himself! What a loser!"

  

Love, Dean Lombardi.

 

"Why don't I look like Mike Richards? If I looked like Richards I bet people would love me."

 It's OK though Ryan I'm sure your new teammates love you. I mean what's not to love? That stupid hair, dumb face, and non-stop crying are really quite attractive. Right Taylor Hall?

  

"Yea umm...you're on your own Ryan. I've got my own issues to work on over here."

So that's it. The Oilers are bad, the Kings should beat them. Seriously, if they just show up their odds are pretty good. Also, try not to slip and fall on Ryan Smyth's tears, we need you guys healthy.

Oh yea, here's a shirtless picture of Mike Richards. Because I can.

 

I love you Mike Richards.

GET THE YARDBARKER APP:
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Gerald McCoy keeps the Jameis Winston hype in check

Gronkowski family to appear on 'Family Feud'

WATCH: Lloyd McClendon has all-time meltdown

Drew Bledsoe defends Tom Brady over Deflategate

Did Heat offer Dwyane Wade less than $10 million per season?

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

David Ortiz brushes aside talk of being 'washed up'

USA Women’s World Cup roster verdict: No excuse not to win

UCF had no idea UConn was creating a rivalry trophy

Cam Newton signs five-year, $103M extension with Panthers

Devils introduce new head coach John Hynes

Report: Heat could make a run at Kevin Durant

Russell Wilson on future with Seahawks: 'We'll see what happens'

QB Blake Sims misses playing for Alabama

WATCH: Joc Pederson hits longest home run of the season

WATCH: Joey Gallo homers in first career game

Former Mississippi State cheerleader suing ESPN after hit by golf cart

Jackson says Bills plan to give McCoy 300-plus carries

McCoy not happy Perryman played dodgeball while injured

College football playoff schedule for 2015: New Year's Eve?

How the Chicago Blackhawks are thriving in salary cap era

Report: Klay Thompson cleared for Game 1 of NBA Finals

Pettine views latest Manziel incident as a ‘non-story’

Nationals need Taylor to produce in Werth’s absence

NHL News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
the YARDBARKER app
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

USA Women’s World Cup: No excuse not to win

Projecting rosters for the 2015 MLB All-Star Game

What Peterson's return means

The Bulls and the culture of fitting in

X-factors for Cavs and Warriors

Pujols: Angels not 'Mike Trout show'

Adrian Peterson returns to Vikings

Chicago Bulls agree to deal with Fred Hoiberg

NBA should have 'legacy contracts' for long-time players

Atlanta Hawks unveil new logo

UAB fans celebrate football reinstatement

Sanchez backs off dismissal of Tebow

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.