Yardbarker goes to Playboy Mansion, June 25

Come join the Yard at the Playboy Mansion. The MediaZone contest is open to everyone. Enter below.

http://mediazonegetsyouin.com/playboyfightnight.php

The winning submission - congrats, Adam!

Listen, because I'm going to be honest with you. Hot Dog & Friends is a blog that primarily covers Seattle-area sports. Have you paid attention to the last 6 months in Seattle-area sports? Unless you're from there or truly, embarrassingly emo, you've probably avoided it in the same way people don't stare directly at the ugly kid. Our baseball team is the laughing stock of the league and just fired their GM in the middle of the season. The head coach of our just above mediocre football team (but they're consistent!) is a lame duck and the front office decided to give the controls to... Jim F*cking Mora? Our professional men's basketball team is being stolen. Our professional women's basketball team is staying. And the less we say here about Washington collegiate athletics these days the better. Trust us.

Things are so damn depressing that we're damn near about to bring grunge back. And no one wants that. Even people in Philly are starting to think we've got it bad. Or maybe it's just the city's collective diabetic coma making them soft. You, however, hold a possible antidote to our grief. T*tties. Alcohol. And grown men beating the living sh*t out of each other. This holy trinity just might back us up from the ledge and remind us all of the positive of sport. Ok... it would only remind one of us. Whatever. You gotta start somewhere. Oh, and we won't get kicked out, puke, or pass out under a pinball machine in the game room. Promise. We totally haven't done that in weeks.

Adam
http://www.hotdogandfriends.com

In second place, we have Andrew Feinstein of http://www.denverstiffs.com/. Diana's personal favorite. 2nd place prize TBD, but, uh... I wouldn't expect much. We sort of spent all our resources on this whole Playboy thing.

Oops. Comic below.

Additional finalist...

Will Brinson is an American Hero. Just a short 9 years ago, he entered college. And just a short week ago, he graduated. He's short. He's fat. He's a raging Redbullaholic. He stays up until 1am on Saturdays live blogging women's rugby. He writes for at least 5 websites along with at least 2 newspapers. He likes attractive women, but routinely settles. He likes sports, but loves gambling (read: losing money to friends, colleagues, and randoms alike). And he enjoys a good stranger like no one you've ever known.

He deserves to represent YB at the playboy party for two main reasons: First, he's basically the best writer on the entire network. Just try to argue it with him- unless you've had the sixer of red bulls he's had, and you can tolerate a barrage of unprovoked 'your mama' jokes spewing from the face of a man who's brother's excuse for getting a 1.8 GPA his freshman year in college was "it's 1.2 better than Will had", you don't stand a chance. Second, he's a short, fat, lazy, underachievement nexus that would enjoy the excess and enlightment a trip to the mansion would provide more than his usual Saturday nights, which have historically been filled with Hot Pockets, Camel Lights, and challenging 9 year olds to 'tug of war' battles on Rock Band, medium level.

In somewhat related news, his birthday happens to be June 26th.

Stamos
http://www.brahsome.com

Another finalist...

Three days ago my grandfather threw a toast to celebrate his fiftieth
anniversary. I was there, in the basement of The Bathurst Jewish Centre--a kind of Jewish YMCA--as fifty or so seventy-plus-year-old men fought over slices of salami and rye bread. All were millionaires with doctor-lawyer-MBA grandsons; all were there for a single reason: to escape their wives. Each shook my hand--some crushing my fingers in their palm--and asked me the same question: "So, whaddaya do next?"

The day before I'd graduated with an MA in English Literature, the product of five years of intense reading and writing. Once my bookshelf, which was anchored into the wall with four-inch bolts, actually pulled away from the sheetrock and fell onto my bed. I had to pack the books in milk crates and donate them to a high school library. I was thinking of this selfless act as these grandfathers interrogated me. "So," one of the old men said, his shirtless torso covered in bread crumbs, "you can talk English, eh?"

None of them cared about the degree. It was only: "What's next?"

Until this morning I thought a PhD was next. But a quick email from my graduate programme supervisor let me know that my application had been "unsuccessful." So now nothing's next. Not a thing. Which is why I'd like to see the Playboy Mansion. The Playboy Mansion--"the Playboy Mansion's Next"--would be something I could wake up for. And those old men and their lace-less shoes, grey hair and black eyelashes, millions of dollars, and JD-MBA-MD grandkids...Well, how about, in two weeks, I get back and tell THEM what was next.

Thanks for your time,

Josh Fagan
http://www.fantasysportstrades.com

My personal favorite. Well done, Josh. Sorry it didn't work out for you. Hopefully we'll be able to create similar opportunities in the future.

Thanks, Dewey. Two close calls. Fifteen percent of applicants take the road to the dissertation, and now just steps away from a trip to the Playboy Mansion...Maybe I'll turn this into a short story. (Alternate ending pending.)

And I guess I should hype my site. http://www.fantasysportstrades.com. (Looks best in Mozilla.)

Final finalist. And with the exception of the first two, these are listed in no particular order.

From the guys at http://www.joesportsfan.com, we received an excellent mp3 entry, which we are unable to post here (and by "unable" I mean that I'm pretty incompetent when it comes to technical stuff like that.) We highly encourage Matt, however, to find a way to include it in the comments. So post it on your blog and link to it here! It was pretty good. Especially if you're not a fan of Coach K.

Very cool prize guys! Awesome offer and am envious.

Congrats Adam

Thanks so much YB. I'll do my best to make everyone proud... As long as you're the type of person who is proud of debauchery.
-Adam
http://www.hotdogandfriends.com

Serious?! Am I bitter? Umm...

There is still a chance to win a free trip to the Playboy Mansion.

http://mediazonegetsyouin.com/playboyfightnight.php

Hey Dewey. Tell the girls next door i said hi !!!

http://partmule.com/blog16/2008/06/19/top-ten-reasons-i-deserve-to-go-to-the-playboy-mansion/

Wow, Yardbarker is really going places...Dewey, you better make the most of this opportunity (I mean do an objective interview with each Playboy bunny, what did you think I meant?)

Jealous I am.

Luky SOBs. Bring back pictures. I personally like to beat kids at guitar hero on the easy level, it is very satisfying.

I WAS AT THE PARTY.... I WAS THE CRAZY BLONDE IN THE RING AFTER THE FIGHTS... (SHOWIN THE ASSets) LOL... ALOT OF PICS WHERE SNAPPED AND I COULDNT GET ANY SO IF YOU HAVE SOME PICS FROM THE PARTY ID LIKE THEM IF YOU WOULD EMAIL THEM TO ME.... I WAS A GUEST OR GEORGE CHONG.... IT WAS GREAT... HAD TO BE THERE TO EVEN UNDERSTAND....

What NBA Player holds the most dribbles
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