Originally written on Oregon Sports News  |  Last updated 11/6/14
It’s fair to say the American medal magnet collected a sack full by conquering water the way England sacked the world when it ruled the seven seas. Everyone goes home a special prize. If Elizabeth I was brave enough to knight an old pirate like Sir Walter Raleigh, Elizabeth II ought to do the same for our newest buccaneer. Who wouldn’t want to see that happen? Since he broke the record for most Olympic medals, and did it in English water, he deserves it. We can do it by following e a few important steps. Like Phelps and his treasure chest, or safety deposit box, England has its vault of hoarded gold too. It’s called The British Museum. Their stuff is so precious that countries of origin want it back. Like an Olympic medalist on the wrong side of a drug test, Marion Jones, England is supposed to return the loot? Greece wants their Elgin Marbles. Egypt wants their mummy. The resoluteness of the British Empire says it won’t happen, thank you very much. Besides, it’s a huge tourist ...
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