Originally written on IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS caught  |  Last updated 11/17/14
Bruce-willis-performs-las
Waitaminute. I’ve seen this movie. Bruce Willis turns out to be dead, the hot chick is a man, and our thirdbaseman is unmasked as Celerino Sanchez. Peter Parker gets bitten by the spider, and Natalie Portman’s hands bleed up to the point where she accepts the Oscar. Watch for the cat: Every time he pops up, the alien is near. And you thought there was a limit to Adam Sandler poop jokes? What if there are two Adam Sandlers, a man and woman!Yeah, we’ve seen this movie, and – trust me here – the ending sucks. The Bronx Bomb. It stars the aging, tired, and clutch-crippled New York Yankees, the worst comedy ensemble since “Ishtar.” Imagine “The Expendables 7,” with Arnold and Sylvester in their eighties, and you’ve got it. We know how it ends. We win the first game, botch the second and then – poof – the chick’s a man, and it’s “Crying Time.” You can see the lost signs in our batting order, like hidden cryptographs found on a History Channel documentary. Here’s Curtis Granderson,
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