Originally posted on IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS caught  |  Last updated 7/29/12
LISTENUP! EVERY DAMN ONE OF YOU.I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANYBODY HERE SMILING! IF I SEE ANYBODY SMILING, HE'LL BE GONE BEFORE ANYBODY CAN SAY, "SCOTT PROCTOR SAW THE DOCTOR."EIGHT YEARS AGO, WHEN WE THREE GAMES UP IN OCTOBER, I REMEMBER SEEING SOME PEOPLE SMILING. REMEMBER EIGHT YEARS AGO, CHILDREN? THREE UP IN OCTOBER? OR HAS THAT MEMORY BEEN BLISSFULLY ERASED FROM YOUR PLAYPEN CHALKBOARDS?EIGHT YEARS AGO, SOME OF YOU PUT AWAY YOUR FURRY TOYS, PUT ON YOUR STAR WARS PAJAMAS AND TRUNDLED OFF TO BEDDYBIE, AND WE SUFFERED THE WORST COLLAPSE IN HISTORY. THE. WORST. COLLAPSE. IN. HISTORY. SO IF ANY OF YOU WIDDLE-BITTY BABIES THINK IT CAN'T HAPPEN AGAIN, THAT MOMMY AND DADDY WILL WIN THE PENNANT FOR YOU, THAT MEAN OLD MR. WORLD OF WARCRAFT SCHILLING IS IN THE POORHOUSE AND CAN'T HURT US... GO! RIGHT NOW! GO SKIP DOWN CANDY LAND LANE, LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE! GO ROOT FOR THE METS, OR THE TRAVELING WILKES BERRIES, OR THE LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, ANGELS OF ANAHEIM. I DON'T GIVE A RAT'S PATOOTY. JUST...
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Best of Yardbarker: Diana Taurasi makes history

The 'Finest running back from America’s Finest City' quiz

2016-17 NBA Awards: The Billy King Award for worst trade

Players who need to turn around their season to save their teams

Three Up, Three Down: Flouting the written and unwritten rules of baseball

Sports & Politics Intersect: Washington gets a rare win

Kicking it: David Villa isn't interested in a 'retirement tour'

The 10 best sports docs available for streaming

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