Big Brother Yellon and His Delusions of Competency

Normally, I try to avoid repeating myself, particularly since it takes me a long time to say anything in the first place. However, this bears repeating. Before launching into Herr Yellon’s magnum opus, “BCB 101: An Overview Of Posting And Commenting,” please allow me to share the following fact. Yes, dear readers, Yellon has actually posted 3,150 words on micro-managing the posting of others. Let’s put this in perspective: A List of Ten Documents that Changed the World, Yet Are Significantly Shorter than Al’s “Overview of Posting and Commenting” 10. The Treaty for the Louisiana Purchase (1803) = 2,675 words. 9. The UN Declaration of Human Rights (1948) = 1,881 words. 8. The “I Have a Dream” Speech, Martin Luther King (1963) = 1,651 words. 7. Chief Seattle’s Oration (1854) = 1,526 words. 6. The Decalaration of Independence (1776) = 1,458 words (incl. signatures). 5. George Washington’s First Inaugural Address (1789) = 1,428 words. 4. Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address (1863) = 1,196 words. 3. The NATO Charter (1949) = 1,146 words. 2. The US Bill of Rights (1789) = 607 words. 1. The Ten Commandments (KJV, Exodus 20: 3-17) = 302 words. Having pointed out this absurdity, I have to limit myself to 1,500 words or so. Unfortunately, Al managed to cram enough sheer idiocy into his 3,150 word Manifesto to keep me busy for days. Fortunately gentle reader, you will be spared some of the horror and tragic waste of the human spirit that is the Al Yellon Experience. We will ignore the run-on sentences, misspelled words, and minor transgressions in order to focus on the Big Picture: Big Brother’s latest assault on truth, beauty, and common sense. In short, Big Brother isn’t just watching you. Now, he’s in your internets, dictating content and presentation. Last November I put up this post about FanPosts and FanShots, to try to explain the difference between them, and give some hints about what makes for a good post of each type, and what they are for. Somehow, after over 4,000 words on the subject, you have failed to provide any sort of meaningful definition or distinction between the two. To date, all I really know is that FanPosts have to be more than 75 words. The fact that I really don’t give a shit may be affecting my reading comprehension, however. Recently, though, I’ve noticed a spate of duplicate posts (last night, we had the third post about Nomar Garciaparra in the last three weeks), and so I thought it was time for a longer post giving much more detail about this site, how to post here, what constitutes good formatting, etc., especially with the first spring training game tomorrow, which will once again ramp up participation here. Dream on, gash. Did you know that Baby Jesus cries whenever you start too many posts about former Cubs’ washouts? It’s true! While I am sympathetic to the notion that three posts concerning Nomar Garciaparra are likely three too many, at least it keeps feeble-minded BCB posters off the streets and away from Rich Hill. Seriously, we have reached the point at which Yellon is 1) Censoring and/or banning all contrary viewpoints; 2) Dictating the content of fan comments; 3) Dictating how these comments are to be posted; 4) Arbitrarily editing content in the process; and 5) Dictating the format, tags, and other aspects of the presentation of ideas. Gosh, BCB is so fucking FUN, I can’t imagine other Cubs’ websites even exist! I never have to think for myself again! Notice how Al completely fails to understand that all of the thread hijackings could be somehow related to the fact that his website sucks the sweat off a dead man’s balls. (Ooops. Al wouldn’t consider that an insult, I suppose.) Thanks to my colleagues at South Side Sox, Lookout Landing and Red Reporter, from whose outstanding guides I have borrowed much of what you see here and adapted to our community and what have become the norms here. You can’t “borrow” content. Either you had permission, or you stole it. I read this as, “I found a way to be an even bigger douche than The Cheat. I’m stealing his content.” At least the guys from Lookout Landing and the Red Reporter kept their guidelines under a 1,000 words each. Many of you have been around since BCB was created in February 2005 and went through The Great Migration to the new platform last March. For a racist scumbag like Al to compare anything on BCB to the Great Migration is a pretty big slap in the face to all African-Americans. “The Great Migration” was the mass exodus of 5 million African-Americans from the Deep South to the Midwest and East from 1916-1930. The Great Migration represented black people attempting to escape the rural poverty, structural unemployment, and marginal educational opportunities that defined Jim Crow’s South. In Chicago alone, this meant that the black population of the city increased by over 30% in this period. Apparently, Al thinks that a few tubby housewives having to edit their internet favorites list represents some sort of mass social movement. (P.S., fuck you, Al.) BCB is NOT a message board. It isn’t a talk radio call-in show. The headline at the top of the page reads “A Chicago Cubs Fan Community Since February 9, 2005”, and that’s the most concise way I can describe this site. BCB itself is a blog, one which has built a community feel to it over the last 4 years. And unlike some blogs that talk at you, BCB offers FanPosts and FanShots where you can drive the conversation. I’ll give Al a little credit here. Since Al Gore retired from the public limelight, someone had to step up and become the Biggest Liar in America. Congratulations, Al. You are the king of disinformation. Let’s start with a working definition of “community.” Merriam-Webster defines “community” as “a unified body of individuals” or “a body of persons or nations having a common history or common social, economic, and political interests.” The central ideas here are that individuals who share a common interest are representatives of a larger group with the same interest(s), and that these associations are organic in nature (i.e. not created arbitrarily). BCB may be many things to many idiots, but it is definitely not a legitimate, healthy community of individuals. BCB presents a classic example of “groupthink.” Groupthink is a behavior exhibited by group members who try to minimize conflict and reach consensus without critically testing, analyzing, and evaluating ideas. Individual creativity, uniqueness, and independent thinking are lost in the pursuit of group cohesiveness, as are the usual advantages of group decision-making, such as a reasonable balancing of choices, perspectives, and individual abilities. Like de-individuation, groupthink is typically associated with cults and the like in that a self-appointed “leader” enforces the groupthink mentality. As William H. Whyte observed as early as 1952, “we are not talking about mere instinctive conformity—it is, after all, a perennial failing of mankind. What we are talking about is a rationalized conformity—an open, articulate philosophy…” Al doesn’t have to talk at you, because he has a few dozen drones to do that for him. You can “drive the conversation” in the same way a kid gets to “drive” his slot cars: endlessly around the exact same track… The Bottom Line: Let review: 1. If a poster is in any way critical of Al or any of his inner circle, that poster is banned. Of course, Yellon does offer the offender the opportunity to grovel before him via email. 2. In the unlikely event someone survives BCB for any significant period and still has something to say, Al has effectively dictated not only where it can be posted, but how it can be posted, how it must be presented, etc. No freethinking individual could possibly be interested in this system. 3. By definition, a community of Cubs’ fans would be just that: a group of people interested in the Chicago National League Ballclub. (I am using the “official” name here to indicate that I mean the real, actual team, not some imaginary construct.) What the hivemind of BCB does not understand is that legitimate interest in the real team (as opposed to some sort of adolescent fantasy) takes many forms. For example, I could burn Wrigley Field to the ground tomorrow, and it wouldn’t affect my interest in the Chicago National League Ballclub one little bit. 4. By stamping out any and all dissenting opinions of any kind, BCB is actively “dumbing down” something that isn’t exactly rocket science in the first place. By only retaining the people he can control via groupthink, Yellon imagines he can control and define who are the “real fans.” In other words, Al is a very, very, very stupid man with no redeeming qualities in evidence; however, by only allowing groupthink, Al has guaranteed that his drones will be even dumber than he is. All in all, I’m sure it’s a great set-up for someone with a messianic complex like Yellon.