Catching Up With … Albert Belle

Nobody’s heard from Uncle Albert in a while. So Bugs&Cranks went digging through the snow over the weekend and found him in Washington, DC. The scene: 14th and U streets NW, nearly paralyzed by two feet of snow. The youngsters with their Tweeters and their YouFaces organized a snowball fight at the hipster intersection. (Q: Does anything scream “policy nerds!” louder than organizing a snowball fight? A: Yes. Organizing a snowball fight with a smartphone.) Anyway, snowballs flew. Fun was had. Until … a couple of snowballs thumped into the side of a passing maroon Hummer. “Run! It’s the cops!” Turns out, that big-ass vehicle belongs to a detective on the DC Police. Said detective angrily exited the ridiculous vehicle … with his...