Cub Fans, Go Have A Martini

Well after this last week of 2009 Cubs baseball, a week that included a double-header sweep by the Pittsburgh Pirates at Wrigley Field the day after the Cubs were eliminated from even sniffing the playoffs, there's really only one thing to do. Go have a giant martini. Go out for it, to someplace worthy. Don't have it on the rocks. Don't have it silly. "Apple", "Cran", "Dirty"...none of these modifiers should be used when ordering the martini I'm talking about. Never order off a "martini" menu. You can order "vodka shaken with ice and served up in a martini glass", but that's all it is and that's how you should order it. A martini is made with gin. My favorite is the original Bombay in the clear bottle with that weird woman on the label. If you like, you can add dry vermouth, and maybe a twist (which would be lemon), or an olive. But that's where it stops. There should be no toying, at a...