Originally written on Razzball  |  Last updated 11/20/14
You say Alcides Escobar, I say Jean Segura…Let's call the whole thing off! That's you and the co-owner of your fantasy team right before your eyes lock after twelve years of friendship and things suddenly get weird. "Doode, you have nacho cheese on your lip and it's in a tear drop shape." "What?" "Nothing. Wanna play touch football? Our team needs a tight end." On a side-sidenote, doesn't Jean Segura sound like an actor from the 1950's? I imagine him lurking in the shadows of Vienna's back alleys. Jean Segura is...The Third Man!... with Joseph Cotten and Ryan Raburn. "Between Switzerland and Milwaukee, they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock and Miller beer." That's Dead Orson Welles schooling you as he waits in line for Zsa Zsa Gabor. "Is she coming or what?!" That's still Dead Orson Welles. Okay, enough hullabaloney, Segura just missed the cutoff of 150 major league ABs for a 2013 fantasy baseball rookie post, so here he is a...
GET THE YARDBARKER APP:
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45
MORE FROM YARDBARKER

Titus Young avoids prison, receives probation

Manziel moves from downtown Cleveland to golf community

Harris sues Mayweather for $20M for lying in an interview with Katie Couric

The NBA needs to leave 'hack-a-whoever' rules alone

Top Rank threatens to sue over Mayweather-Pacquiao piracy

LIKE WHAT YOU SEE?
GET THE DAILY NEWSLETTER:

Titans already tailoring offense to suit Mariota's strengths

Pettine: Manziel isn't favorite for Browns' starting QB job

Randy Gregory denies 'weed problem,' says he's immature

Jameis Winston wants Bucs to sign LSU OT La'El Collins

Chris Bosh on blood clot diagnosis: ‘I’m lucky to be alive’

Eagles coach Chip Kelly made a mess at quarterback

No homers, no problem for Cubs' Kris Bryant

Eagles' Chip Kelly & Sam Bradford: In like, but not love

NFL releases times and dates for preseason slate

Fans file $5M class action suit against Pacquiao over injury

Making sense of the AL East pile-up

Brandon Prust sorry for saying referee ‘tries to play God’

Ron Roenicke and the career afterlives of fired managers

Knicks announcer's MVP ballot had Curry behind Marc Gasol

Edelman mocks Belichick in Cinco de Mayo tweet

Projecting the 2015 MLB All-Star Game rosters after April

Tiger hasn't slept in three days since Lindsey Vonn breakup

David Blatt: ‘No excuses’ for Cavaliers’ Game 1 loss to Bulls

MLB News
Delivered to your inbox
You'll also receive Yardbarker's daily Top 10, featuring the best sports stories from around the web. Customize your newsletter to get articles on your favorite sports and teams. And the best part? It's free!

By clicking "Sign Me Up", you have read and agreed to the Fox Sports Digital Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. You can opt out at any time. For more information, please see our Privacy Policy.
the YARDBARKER app
Get it now!
Ios_download En_app_rgb_wo_45

Eagles' Chip Kelly & Sam Bradford: In like, but not love

Manziel moves from downtown Cleveland

Making sense of the AL East pile-up

Chris Bosh on blood clot diagnosis: ‘I’m lucky to be alive’

Projecting the All-Star Game rosters

Tiger hasn't slept in three days since Lindsey Vonn breakup

2015 NBA Draft big board, first edition

Eliminate Hack-A-Player: Don't reward violating sports rules

No easy solution to the problem of early NFL draft entrants

What’s next for the Spurs?

Cauley-Stein changes middle name to 'Trill'

NFL has Los Angeles Rams webpage

Today's Best Stuff
For Bloggers

Join the Yardbarker Network for more promotion, traffic, and money.

Company Info
Help
What is Yardbarker?

Yardbarker is the largest network of sports blogs and pro athlete blogs on the web. This site is the hub of the Yardbarker Network, where our editors and algorithms curate the best sports content from our network and beyond.