If Brewers closer John Axford wants to repeat as winner of the American Mustache Institute’s Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year Award, he’s going to have a difficult time doing so, now that Axford has shaved off the glorious mustache that nabbed him the prestigious award in the first place.
Axford tweeted a photo of his follicle remains last night with no words, only a simple, yet poignant hashtag that read #RIP. He courteously placed the shaved hair into the same configuration as it was found on his face to further the confirmation that he is indeed a clean shaven individual now.
Here’s the saddest picture of facial hair not attached to a relief pitcher’s face you will ever see…
Not sure why Axford decided to shave off his facial fuzz, seeing that it’s become a huge part of his persona, unless it has something to do with the fact that he’s having a pretty down year so far (0-2 with 7 saves, 1 blown save, and a 4.11 ERA), and losing the ‘stache is a way of reversing his fortune. Hopefully dropping his patented whiskers on purpose won’t have a Samson-like effect on the Milwaukee reliever. Either way, here’s hoping Axford doesn’t put his facial hair on eBay, because you know there’s some freak out there willing to buy it.
/checks PayPal account for funds, scours eBay for “Brewers closer John Axford mustache shavings” auction
[@JohnAxford, top pic via]